We Need To Abandon This Piece of Relationship Advice

We’ve all heard it before — but is it serving us?

Casey Braga
Wholistique

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Photo by George Gvasalia on Unsplash

I think back to all of the advice I’ve been given over the years about love and I can’t help but feel deceived. Wisdom is passed down to us in many forms and when it comes to love, it finds its way to us in bad clichés: love means never having to say you’re sorry, love will set you free, love is blind. I learned to accept that life is not fair and that it could be hard, but for most of my life I fervently refused to accept that love would be anything but idyllic when I finally found the right person.

It frustrates me to think of how for many years I believed that when I met the right person that it would be easy. I can’t count the number of times someone gave me this advice or some variation of it. When you meet the one it will just feel right or you will be surprised how easy it all is. Looking back I can see that part of the reason I never questioned this advice — and rather clung to it with determination — is because I desperately wanted it to be true.

After a breakup that was most definitely not amicable or mutual, I would be comforted by the notion that the relationship failed because the person just wasn’t right for me. For many folks, they meet someone and it is easy for them, and I’m not questioning that. If love…

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Casey Braga
Wholistique

I’m just trying to learn as much as I can when I’m here. Student of counselling psych and my many mistakes. Soft-hearted, open-minded, slow-moving.