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Lies and Manipulation: The Key to Living Happily Ever After

5 rules to follow if you want to stay married forever

Carol Anne Shaw
Wholistique
6 min readMar 26, 2021

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I’ve been married for over three decades. After doing a little math, I realize that works out to be around 290,000 hours. Whoa, that’s a lot of time to spend under one roof with the same person.

The other day, my friend, Maggie, asked me what “our secret” was — just how had my husband and I managed to stay committed to our life of domestic bliss. Maggie and I were having coffee, and at that point, I snorted some of it out my nose. Domestic bliss? That’s pretty loaded, I told my friend.

But Maggie wouldn’t let it go. Then she suggested I write about it.

I think I snorted again because I am by no means a marriage guru, perfect partner, or an expert on the subject. I’m a “fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants” kind of person when it comes to most things, my marriage included. Looking back, I realize that my husband, Richard and I had ventured down the marital path without any sort of navigational map. We’d met in art school in the 80s and had bonded over tertiary colours, tea, and The Talking Heads. Full of idealism and bullshit, we were fearless… and clueless. We were both in our early twenties, rebounding from other relationships, and neither of us had a pot to piss in. In short, we’d…

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Wholistique
Wholistique

Published in Wholistique

Personal stories on self-discovery, relationships, and a holistic path to happiness. Wholistique is about growth, not fixing — because you’re not broken. We aim to shift your perspective and empower you with tools to navigate life.

Carol Anne Shaw
Carol Anne Shaw

Written by Carol Anne Shaw

Writer & audiobook narrator. Author of three award-winning books for mg readers (Ronsdale Press) & four indie-pubbed novels for young adults. Vancouver Isle, BC

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