Put Your Own Oxygen Mask On First
And other important relationship advice
I am trolling around for relationship advice lately. Don’t ask me why, since I’m not really IN a relationship. I’m still reeling from the sting of a nasty divorce, and barely sticking my toe in the tepid water of maybe dating as we emerge from our pandemic cocoons. But it’s interesting, the advice columns out there from people in rock-solid relationships, marriages, partnerships. I’m intrigued.
How do people make it work?
My mom and dad were married for nearly 25 years, and their relationship only ended because my father died. I have zero doubt that they’d have made it to a golden anniversary. My aunt and uncle just celebrated 55 years together. It’s sweet to imagine. My grandmother, also widowed fairly early on, shunned the idea of ever dating another man because, she said, “I’ve had filet mignon, why would I ever settle for hamburger?” What a delightful thought!
So I peruse advice columns, hoping to crack the code.
Of course I haven’t found the super-secret-weapon, but I’ve learned a few things here and there. But the most profound thing I have caught on to isn’t really advice strictly about relationships surviving or not — it’s all about inward-caring. It’s about how we simply cannot give much of anything to another…
