When You’re Looking For A Lasting Love In An Instant Gratification World

Love is supposed to be patient

Alexandria Brown
Wholistique
Published in
3 min readMay 8, 2021

--

Photo by Leo Hidalgo

Instant gratification. Modern dating and instant gratification go hand and hand. And I’d love to sit here and tell you that I’m an exception to the rule. Fuck getting to know someone when I can have what I want from them in 10 minutes. I don’t want to know your deep dark secrets when I can get in and get out without a trace of feelings. Feelings just get you into trouble. Trouble that no one has time to deal with anymore.

My need for instant gratification leads me to realize too late that I actually care about someone.

I pretend that my shell is hard and that nothing, especially not feelings, can get under my skin and make me feel something other than nothing. Because all I want is the feelings that come from the extreme highs instead of the extreme self-doubt.

Our current society is designed to indulge in instant gratification in dating.

Log on to a dating app. Swipe right. Wait for a match. Matched. The match will do. Text come over. Easy enough isn’t it? A process many of us repeat on a regular basis. I can’t say that I’ve bought into the whole app dating but I know people who have and love it. I have my own version of Tinder that doesn’t require messaging strangers.

--

--

Alexandria Brown
Wholistique

You can find Alex writing about heartbreak, depression or love. Work with me www.alexandriabrown.ca.