If they knew us, they’d love us.
A great man stands before us. Time does truly bring wisdom. I congratulate this man of the knowledge he has gained and further seeks to gain.” — Ferdi Ferhat Özsoy
His Story:
Long story short, I was on the 36-people no-travel-blacklist of Syria. You must be wondering: “What horrible thing did he do to get there?” But honestly, the only thing I did was try to improve the country by challenging the authority and getting out of my way to do good.
I am originally from Aleppo. I lived my childhood in Homs, some of my life in Damascus, and most of it in Aleppo. I finished my university education and currently have two diplomas — one in Arabic literature, and one in Islamic studies. I’m married, with three boys and two girls. During my time in Syria, I’ve started a training center and a publishing house, in which we made studies and researchers. I also was a part of Syria’s publishers’ union. I feel like the organization I founded, ‘Dar Al Multaqa’, reflects my real identity. I always told myself Wherever you were, you have to leave your mark, effect, impact behind,” and so our goal in the organization is determined by asking ourselves “How can we leave an impact on humans?”
Generally speaking, those whose projects are about building and developing the intellect of the people — those who are not associated with the regime — there is a lot of danger for them. For instance, we always get threats. So, how can we find a balance? I don’t want to go against the regime so I wouldn’t be imprisoned, and at the same time, I wanna do what I believe in. Even though my whole life and plan have changed, my mission hasn’t! I kept on working in Syria under all the pressure. I’d walk to work and look down the street wondering if there were any police cars waiting to arrest me.
Any decision I make in my life depends on four principles. If it doesn’t work with even one of them, I don’t take that decision. And any project I do has to fulfill at least one of them. These are the 4 principles: [1] Love myself, [2] love others, [3] love my nation, and [4] love Allah the Almighty. All my life must go according to these principles.
One of my most emotional stories happened when someone from security talked to me, which was not unusual. The officer asked me to do something that I refused to do, which lead to my arrest and imprisonment for 62 days. The interrogator there asked him what we wanted, and so I said “We want the stability of the country. We see our country with fires in it. We want to help the government to be fire extinguishers. We don’t want the country to burn, to go away. You are dealing with the situation as if it’s a security matter; those boys whom you’re treating like that, they need compassionate hearts to contain them and hear what they want.” and demanded that they fix the situation. Of course, this dialogue was faced with anger and denial.
Just telling these stories all over again is like opening old wounds. I am trying to hold myself together, or else I would break down and not be able to speak a thing…
For four years, I haven’t seen any of my relatives in Syria. And for a whole year, I couldn’t see my family. After a lot of effort and spending of money, I was able to get them back to me. Family separation is extremely painful, but there’s nothing on hand to do about it. But honestly, I believe that Turkey has embraced us and welcomed us upon coming here. And when we measure ourselves to our other relatives in other places, we feel blessed. But I do have one thing to criticize: the law isn’t allowing us to give something back to the community that’s welcoming us. I feel like Turkey hasn’t given me space to serve myself, this country, and my own country. And since I feel a duty to have an impact here in Turkey, it bothers me alot. Also, re-building my own country is my duty, but we aren’t able to do that here for several reasons, like the fact that we don’t master the language and aren’t familiar with the law of the country. And I blamed the state itself because it’s not helping us learn.
One of my bittersweet memories was when we attempted to translate one of Ahmet Davutoğlu’s books: The Depth of Strategy. Unfortunately, we found out that just a few days before we contacted him for translation, Aljazeera had made a deal with them for the translation of the book.
As Syrians, I dare say we are a living daily, internal struggle to keep our balance. My message to all the Turkish people would be: Firstly, I need to know what you think of us before I tell my message. I need to know what you see when you look at me. Because when you do look at me, you see what you think of me, not what I really am. Secondly, we are like all the people of the world. We have good people and better people; bad people and worse people. And I think that most of those who sought refuge are good people. Because who runs from conflict and war? only good and peaceful people would seek stability. As to my hopes for Syrians, I hope Syrian people find themselves somewhere where people know how to invest in them because if that’s done, they will prove themselves very resourceful and intelligent.
