11 Shortcuts To Improve Yourself
To improve yourself is to do little acts of nourishment every day.
1. Count your three wins of today and decide the three you want for tomorrow
“One step forward is a step in the right direction.” — Kara Goucher
Every night and before falling asleep, practice counting the three wins of that day. It can be from “I won the lottery” to “I made a nice coffee”. Then decide the three wins you want to have on the next day. This is an effective technique to mentally track your daily life and put you in the mood to wake up the next morning.
2. Learn how to love yourself more
“Be nice to yourself. It’s hard to be happy when someone is mean to you all the time.” ― Christine Arylo
Especially during the bad days.
What do you say to yourself when you wake up and see your reflection in the mirror? If you notice that what you say is not that nice, practice saying things like “you look beautiful today” or “good morning rock star” or “I'm on my way to have a wonderful life”. Even if you don’t believe what you’re saying, it works. Say something that makes you feel good.
What you say to yourself is important. What you tell yourself right after you wake up will dictate the rest of your day.
So be nice to yourself as you would be to someone else.
3. Get to know yourself better
“Until you get comfortable with being alone, you’ll never know if you’re choosing someone out of love or loneliness.” — Mandy Hale
How do you behave when no one is around? And how do you behave when you’re surrounded by people? Knowing ourselves is easier when we're alone. This means sleeping alone sometimes, even if you’re committed to someone. Going to a restaurant alone and have a meal by yourself. Going to the cinema alone.
Learn to enjoy your company.
4. Listen more than you talk
“The art of conversation lies in listening.” — Malcom Forbes
We have one mouth and two ears for some reason. Still, what most of us do is talk. We just forget to give back because we’re moving too fast. So start listening, and really show interest when someone is talking to you. Do this without letting your mind wander and without thinking about the next thing to say.
5. Practice authenticity
“Only the truth of who you are, if realized, will set you free.” — Eckhart Tolle
We all wear countless masks, and that’s ok. That’s what we do to survive. However, we can easily get carried away. One day you wake up and you don’t know yourself anymore. Have you ever asked yourself — "Who am I?"
We all do, eventually.
Practice being authentic. Leave the courtesies and manners. Say what you think and meet your needs. Just don’t fall into the trap of being arrogant, you can say what you think and be authentic — yes — but coming from a place of love, humility and honesty.
6. Be friends with your emotions
“But feelings can’t be ignored, no matter how unjust or ungrateful they seem.” ― Anne Frank
Our emotions exist to let us know how we feel about certain people, situations, places and so on. Emotions are our compass. The good ones and the bad.
But the truth is, there are actually no good or bad emotions, that’s just how we labelled them (like anger, fear or sadness — if we're talking about bad emotions).
Be friends with all your emotions, don’t avoid them.
Don’t ignore them. They are yours, and you are theirs.
Practice feeling your emotions. How? — Simply feel all the emotions you have throughout the day. If some of them make you uncomfortable, it means you need to do something or change something about a certain thing. Try feeling each emotion in your body, see where it goes or where it persists to stay. Is it in your chest? Your throat? Your back?
Then name those emotions for what they are and realize why you are feeling them. They are there to help you.
7. Tame your ego
“Let us be more simple and less vain.” — Jean-Jacques Rousseau
Either big or small, our egos exist because of a feeling of weakness, and a desire to self-worth. In a way, ego makes us selfish. Huge egos don’t work on our behalf, as ego causes more harm than rational thinking. When you let your ego control you, you lose control over your decisions and gain a tendency to choose the wrong thing to do.
This is why you have to check on your ego every now and then.
Practice not interrupting others when they speak, not judging, not letting yourself get carried away by the first impression of a person. Don’t engage in gossip. Laugh at yourself and don’t take things so seriously.
8. Interact more with the people around you
“There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.” — William Butler Yeats
Do you know your neighbors? Do you sit on the subway or bus and everyone is holding their phones? Do you always hold on to your phone?
Practice saying “hello!” to the people that live in your building or neighborhood. We are a social species. We should start acting like one.
9. Improve your relationships
“No road is long with good company.” — Turkish Proverb
Some of us can count their good relationships in a single hand, some of us have a football team. It’s all fine, as long as they do good to you.
Relationships are important for the sake of our sanity. Keep the good ones, then invest in them and you’ll get wonders in return.
Call the ones you love most, do something for them that is unexpected and without thinking of getting something back. Compliment them for the conquers they do, even the small ones.
There is a saying claiming that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. There's a good reason why this saying is popular.
10. Help someone having an easier life
“All joy in this world comes from wanting others to be happy, and all suffering in this world comes from wanting only oneself to be happy.” — Shantideva
If at times you think you have a difficult life, look around. There are so many people struggling so much. Helping someone gives us one of the most unbelievable good feelings we can feel. You can volunteer to help people in need, or just be kind to someone entering the grocery shop and hold the door. Practice acts of helping every day.
We were made to help each other.
11. Improve your relationship with money
“Too many people spend money they haven’t earned to buy things they don’t want to impress people that they don’t like.” — Will Rogers
What’s your money story? Are you generous? A spender? Are you financially happy? Do you feel free?
You can see money as a type of energy — it comes and goes. Whether we like it or not, money rules the world and we can have a lot of it, some, very little or no money. But in the end, it all begins with how you treat your money.
Do you respect it or waste it? Do you share it?
Have a look at your relationship with money. Take time every week to sit down for 20 minutes and check your bank accounts and credit cards. See where your money is going and how you spend it.
If you think that “money only comes with hard work”, “money doesn’t grow on trees” or “money is bad”, practice nurturing your relationship with money and look at money as a tool.
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