On Feeling Lost During COVID-19
Existential lostness. That’s what my counseling clients, and sometimes my friends, have been describing since we began to navigate the new direction presented by COVID-19. I’ve felt it myself. Days blend into one another and seem eerily the same. Places where we previously attached meaning seem suddenly devoid of it. We don’t know when we’ll hug our loved ones again, assuming they (or we) even survive the ordeal. We’re not sure where our support is coming from, if it’s coming at all. We’re not sure if we’re utterly lost, or if we’re witnessing the birth of a desirable new reality.
When GPS systems were first introduced for cars, my dad gave me one immediately with the disclaimer, “For most people, this is a luxury; for you, it’s a borderline necessity.” That’s how often I get lost. Armed with the GPS and my stack of print maps, I would still call him late at night, turned around on some familiar highway in the city where I grew up, and ask him to guide me back home.
I get lost walking on the trails near my house. I get lost on my way to my favorite shops. I get lost on the way to meetings for which I should be on time. I get lost when my gas tank is running low and I have to pee and it’s dark out and I don’t know where to safely stop.
I read a story once about a woman who was lost in the woods and panicked. She walked herself in circles…
