Familiarity breeds mistakes
Blonde Date
I ❤️ valentines
Blind date on Valentine’s? How bad could it be? Not like Reginald would end up married to his mother. At worst, an evening so bad his best friend Ronnie would owe him forever. Reginald forgave Ronnie when he saw the girl’s picture. A picture from a beach party. A blonde in a bikini, the kind of woman whose bod compelled you to express the kind admiration that got you jammed with a #MeToo hashtag on Twitter.
Her picture reminded him of someone, but he couldn’t place it. Probably a girl he met at a Frat party.
Not like his roommate Bernice. What a loser in her frumpy sweatshirts and baggy pants, nose buried in books and demanding that he listen to his music on his iPhone so she could study. And he’d thought signing up for a co-ed dorm would be non-stop nooky. The only music on her playlist was probably sitars and wooden flutes.
Reginald forgave Ronnie when he saw the girl’s picture. A picture from a beach party. A blonde in a bikini, the kind of woman whose bod compelled you to express the kind admiration that got you jammed with a #MeToo hashtag on Twitter.
Ronnie once told him she might surprise him, that the girl could cut loose after a big test, but Reginald couldn’t imagine her cutting loose. Probably a wild session of Scrabble with herbal tea shots.
The restaurant door opened and his date stepped through. Hotter than a skirt steak on a restaurant grill. All business in a man’s tuxedo with a black silk tie and no shirt, jacket carefully taped to keep Reginald guessing. If only he could think why she looked so familiar.
He’d already arranged roses in a vase on the table, and as soon as she sat, he ordered champagne. This girl was getting the full court press. He reached across the table to introduce himself when she donned her glasses to scan the menu. No need for introductions now, she was his roommate Bernice.
She ran an eye down the appetizers. “I told Ronnie you wouldn’t even ask my name once he showed you the picture.” She settled against the chair back. “And this date’s going to cost you.”
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Wry noir author Phillip T. Stephens wrote Cigerets, Guns & Beer, Raising Hell, the Indie Book Award winning Seeing Jesus, and the children’s book parody Furious George. Follow him at Phillip T Stephens.
