Just because you’re useless, it doesn’t mean… Actually, come to think of it, it does.
Free Hand Dan
Texas Small Tales
…continued from yesterday
THE RANCH HANDS TOLD DIMEBOX DAN he’d never be a genuine cowboy until he learned to chop firewood. So, they sent him out with an axe and waited to see if he would split logs or split open his leg. Odds on the log went at 20 to 1, which no one won because he returned to the ranch that evening dragging twigs bound with his belt and holding up his pants with his free hand.
Clem, the foreman, spit a wad of tobacco next to his boot. “Twigs ain’t firewood, Dan.”
To which Dan replied, “They’ll burn, won’t they?”
Then the ranch hands told Dan he’d never be an honest to God cowboy until he learned to cut and roll hay for the horses. So he lit out after breakfast and returned just before dinner with a handful of hay bound with his belt and holding up his pants with his free hand.
Clem, the foreman, spit a wad of tobacco next to his other boot. “That much hay won’t fill a foal’s stomach.”
To which Dan replied, “The hay dulled my pocket knife blade.”
The ranch hands told Dan he’d never be an honest to God…
