4 Negotiation Lessons I Learned from Netflix Shows
Discover negotiation skills from fictional characters: a show host, a loan shark, a patient assistant, and an expat in Paris.
Watching Netflix is a remedy for me — it gives me a mental break and the power to return to work and face reality. Moreover, it often teaches me valuable lessons that I can immediately apply in the workplace.
In this article, I would like to introduce 4 valuable nuggets about negotiation that I learned while watching Netflix shows.
Negotiation has not been easy for me because I received an education that taught me “For women, yielding is a virtue” and “Put others’ needs over what you want.” Speaking up for what I want requires excessive bravery.
So, I hope this article gives a nudge to women who are hesitant to ask for what they want. Although the shows I introduce are fictional, the lessons they teach are undeniably real.
1. Don’t solely focus on expressing your own desires and situation
What is negotiation? It’s a process where you and your counterpart each have wants or needs, and you exchange concessions or resources to achieve mutually desired outcomes.
However, I’ve seen plenty of cases where people simply describe their situation without making it relevant to the other party, hoping to get what they want.
But here’s the deal: the counterpart will always ask, “What’s in it for me?” If you can’t come up with a convincing answer to that question, negotiating successfully will be quite the challenge.
In the workplace, when requesting a raise, it is important to highlight your work contributions rather than solely depending on your personal desires or situation.
Check out this typical argument that goes like, “I need a raise because I need it,” and the counter-argument from the movie ‘Late Night’ that highlights why it’s not an effective approach.
Gabe(The writer): I’m in a single-income household. And Jen and I just had our second baby, Taylor. Adorable, huh? So there’s just a lot of expenses at home right now, and I think it’s time for a raise.
Katherine(The boss): What you’re describing is the most clear-cut example of the classic sexist argument for the advancement of men in the workplace. You’re asking for a raise not for any work-related contribution, but because you have a family. And that’s why, in the 1950s, family men were promoted over the women they worked with.
2. Negotiate to build a package, not just one measure
We often get fixated on numbers like prices or salaries when negotiating. It seems like getting a higher amount is the only measure of success in a negotiation.
But that’s not entirely true. We need to reflect on the values we prioritize and what we can offer in exchange for them.
Take salary negotiation, for instance. There are numerous factors to consider: the scope of work, benefits, annual leave, work-life balance, health insurance coverage, flexible working hours, bonuses, promotion opportunities, business travel, and more.
You can ask for these conditions in exchange for your skills and expertise, creating a package that aligns with your values and lifestyle.
Let’s dive into “The Gentlemen,” an intense yet entertaining show created by Guy Ritchie, to explore how Tommy, the loan shark gangster, constructs a package as a condition to lower the interest.
Here’s the situation: Freddy owes 4 million pounds, and Tommy is demanding 8 million, with half of it being the original amount and the other half as interest. Enter Susie, a business partner of Freddy’s family, who steps in to negotiate the deal.
Susie(The negotiator): Look, we both know you’re not gonna get the full eight, so let’s be realistic. What happens if I can get you the original four in cash by the end of the week?
Tommy(The gangster): I can’t write off four million in interest. What about if we treat it as an investment into your operation*? (*A weed business)
Susie: No, that’s not gonna work. I’m not looking for investors. But I am still trying to find a way through this. Somehow.
Tommy: When would I get the four million?
Susie: You can pick it up on Friday. Sweetened with a bar’s worth of white widow super cheese*. (*Means 1 additional million pounds worth Marijuana)
Tommy: All right. On one condition. He*’s got to apologize. (*Freddy)
Susie: Understood.
Tommy: And I want it recorded for posterity. There’s a video I would like him to emulate.
Susie: So, if I get you the four, and the super cheese, and the video with an apology. Are we good?
Tommy: Oh aye, yeah. You get me all that, we’re golden.
3. The patient party comes out on top
Sometimes negotiations reach an impasse and can drag on, requiring tedious adjustments, causing frustration, and even involving intentional delaying tactics.
However, it’s crucial not to lose your patience and to maintain a calm demeanor throughout the process. Remember, victory favors the patient negotiator.
A scene from “Bojack Horseman” exemplifies this when a strike occurs among the assistants and Lenny, a turtle-headed character on the boss’s side, starts to lose his patience. The assistants were able to secure favorable terms due to Judah, the representative’s composure.
Lenny(The boss’s side): These strike negotiations have lasted so long, it’s like Reds in this boardroom. Remember Reds? Two VHS tapes. That’s too many tapes, I said, but no one listens to Lenny.
Judah(The assistant’s side): You’re making up the projected loss by excising office birthday cakes. That’s unacceptable.
Princess Caroline(The boss’s side): Everybody hates office parties!
Judah: Everyone hates the mysterious dried fruit cubes in trail mix but we still eat them after the other nuts and seeds are gone because in our undervalued, overworked existence, we’re desperate for any morsel of satisfaction, whether that be cake, unidentifiable orange fruit shards, or the occasional kind word from our boss.
4. Be true to who you are
Negotiation is not solely about tactics and schemes. It requires introspection to understand who we are and what we truly desire in order to determine our goals for any negotiation.
I truly believe that being nice and true is the way to thrive in this crazy world. If you genuinely enjoy your work and extend a helping hand to others, people will inevitably acknowledge your positive influence, and the rewards will naturally come your way. (But let’s also remember not to be excessively naive and to watch out people who may seek to exploit you.)
Take a scene from “Emily in Paris” for example. Even after getting fired, Emily still jumps in to help Sylvie with her pitch. She’s the kind of person who genuinely loves her work and is always ready to lend a hand to those around her.
Sylvie: I know it was you behind the Edgard and Cooper campaign. Did you think I wouldn’t find out? Or was that your intention all along?
Emily: It’s not that calculated. I was just trying to be helpful. Okay? I didn’t want to waste a perfectly good deck.
Sylvie: So you gave your ideas away. What could you possibly stand to gain from that?
Emily: Sylvie, believe it or not, I don’t have an ulterior motive. I really want you to succeed. With or without me.
Sylvie: Yeah, but I’m too proud to steal someone else’s ideas. So we’ll have to come to some sort of arrangement.
Emily: Oh, my God! Yes, I’m so there!
I hope these lessons prove useful to you, and good luck if you find yourself in a situation that requires negotiation skills.
I also hope you find enjoyment in these well-crafted and captivating shows. If you’re seeking something to watch, give one of them a try. Enjoy!
