What is love?
Question: Dear master, Jiddu Krishnamurti says, “When you love, you are neither giving, nor receiving.” Acharya Ji, does love have an object? Could you explain how can we love in daily life, without giving or receiving? What is love, if it has no object?
Acharya Prashant: All objects are small.
The object of love is so gigantic, that you cannot call it an ‘object’. Further, all objects leave ample space for you to remain. All objects leave space for the dualistic subject to remain, and prosper.
The object of love is so big, so total, so filling, so occupying, so unrelenting, so very compelling, that it leaves no space for the subject to hide and survive.
Obviously, if the subject is gone, who can call the object, an object. So, the object of love is a non-object. Those who have come before us, have called that object as — Truth, God, Beloved, Amma-Baba, Father, Maa.
Next, you are asking, “How can one be in love without giving or receiving?” Giving and receiving, both imply your presence and your activity. You have to be there to give, you have to be there to receive. And in both, your presence, your being, gets stamped, certified, further ascertained. In giving, you remain as the giver. In receiving, you strike roots as the receiver.
So, in love, there is neither giving nor receiving. Simply put, no doing of the doer. No-doing of the doer is also the highest doing of the little doer. The highest of the little doer.
I give an example to you. I have heard of this little soldier, he was actually a civilian, in one of the wars in the last century. He was so small, he was not even trained as a soldier. His village had been invaded, the villagers had been captured, taken away for forced labour. They were being used to construct a bridge. That’s what the invading army was using the locals for, take them away and use their labour to build a bridge.
Now that the enemy has taken them away, they are with the enemy. And this little one could see a big ammunition depot. A big ammunition depot. You are already guessing it, right? There was not much, he could have done, all by himself. The enemy numbered in hundreds, hundreds of well-built, grown-up, trained soldiers, with firearms. What could the boy have done? But there was one thing that the boy could do, with a little bit of ingenious engineering. He rammed himself into the depot and blew the entire depot off. Obviously, nothing of him remained. But, it took down the entire non-sense with him.
So, that’s love- attempting the impossible. The task is so damn big, that it can’t be done if you protect yourself. If you protect yourself, it won’t happen. That’s love.
Excuse me for giving a violent analogy. But he, who has a lot of bloodshed, he is indeed involved in love. Love does involve a lot of demolition. And there are fireworks. And things come down. Great structures collapse. Formidable enemies have to be defeated. All that is love.
You want something beyond your size, you want something beyond your measure.
And it will require all of you to get that.
If you care for your safety, if you care for your survival, it just can’t happen.
That’s love.