Know that you don’t know everything
You are the sum of your experiences. These make up your beliefs. But how flexible are you? Are you willing to concede when you’re wrong? You could be missing out…
I often write about my negative traits (of which there are many), and what I’m doing to overcome them. However, this time I’d like to write about one of my rare positive traits…
When in an argument, if presented with proof or a sufficiently strong counter, I will happily accept the opposing viewpoint and adopt it.
This may sound trivial, but it’s really not. Think about it, how often do you find yourself arguing with someone who simply will not admit that they’re wrong? And be honest, how often do you do this yourself?
It’s frustrating, isn’t it?
It’s also time consuming, tedious, irritating, and often immensely trivial.
Thankfully, Google can come to the rescue in many situations, however there are still some scenarios for which we simply have to debate.
Debate can be fascinating, and highly educational. But only if you go into it with the right frame of mind. If you come in open and receptive, you can have a healthy discussion. If you come in rigid and closed off, you soon find yourself facing the frustration, irritation, and triviality with which we are all familiar.
The emphasis here is not on being defeatist or non-confrontational, but simply to be willing to accept stances or beliefs in opposition to your own (and perhaps abandon yours if applicable). By no means concede if you are unconvinced, just remain willing to do so should you be given sufficient proof.
What this enables you to do is learn new things and be able to adapt. This will make you stronger. If on the other hand you close yourself off to new ideas, you make yourself unapproachable and liable to be left behind; this applies to both work and pleasure…
At home
They say that compromise lies at the heart of a strong marriage, and for good reason; can you imagine spending your life with someone unwilling to admit when they are wrong? And with the situation reversed, do you think they’d stick with you?
At work
In the workplace, listening and believing in others is crucial. You cannot know everything about anything. You think you know everything there is about every aspect of your business, and that nobody knows better than you? I guarantee that is not the case, and if you are unwilling to listen to the ideas and advice of others you will miss out; perhaps minimally, perhaps catastrophically.
Additionally, it is important to remember that what we know to be ‘fact’ is constantly changing. At one point ‘fact’ held that the earth was flat. This may sound like a ridiculous example, but you may recall that Pluto is no longer considered a planet (as of August 2006)! There is also an ongoing debate currently about how many moons the earth has! The well-known and generally accepted answer is one, but other theories hold that there are thousands, and conversely none (that the Earth and the Moon are instead a double planet system)!
What now?
When you next find yourself in an argument, resist the temptation to knuckle-down and put up a fight. Instead, focus on keeping your mind receptive and open. Argue your stance by all means, but if your opponent has a valid point do not be afraid to accept it.
By admitting that you are wrong (or even just that you cannot do it on your own), you embrace and engage with others around you. This is important for managers, employees, friends, partners… everything. Do not make yourself unapproachable; show that you are willing to admit your own limitations.
As an aside, I was unable to think of a single term that succinctly summed up a person’s willingness to admit to defeat (maybe open-mindedness?)! As such, I’d be keen to hear not only of what you have learned by admitting that you were wrong, but also if you are aware of what this trait can best be referred to as!
In the absence of an existing term, I’m considering coining a new phrase; perhaps ‘stance-responsive’?
Originally published at wordsbydavid.com on October 18, 2015.
About the Author: David Whitaker is a freelance writer, who spent years in the corporate rat race before deciding that life is too short to not spend it doing what you love! He now spends his time writing about life and trying to enjoy it as much as possible.
If you like what he writes, please like, share, or comment!
David’s personal blog is at wordsbydavid.com and you can follow him on twitter at @wordsbydavid or at https://au.linkedin.com/in/whitakerd
