Dear People Who Drink La Croix
Did you know water is a thing?
Hi. I have many questions.
What’s your favorite flavor?
Why did you start drinking it?
Did you know water exists?
What three words spring to mind when you think about your beloved La Croix?
I have a friend who said, “Lacroix is life and we actually pay extra to have Amazon ship it internationally bc without Lacroix there is no life.” Do you agree with this person?
Have you tried water before?
What La Croix flavor would you like to see in the future?
I have another friend who challenged me to a joust when he learned about my stance on La Croix. Not an American Gladiators joust, but A Knight’s Tale joust. Do you know where I can find a stable that will accommodate this ridiculous challenge?
Can you describe, in painstaking detail, how water irrevocably hurt you in the past?
How on earth do you pronounce it? Is it La Croy or La Kwah? A friend told me, “I read somewhere that it’s named La Croix because it rhymes with ‘enjoy.’ And I do. I enjoy it.” Does it rhyme with “enjoy”?
I just realized I’ll also need a blacksmith to outfit me for the joust. Do blacksmiths still…
