How To Trick Or Treat As An Adult

It’s possible! Here’s the 3-step guide.

NOVEMBER 1

Step 1

Look at all the candy in your house. Wow, that’s a lot of candy.

Some of it might be stuff you didn’t give away last night. Some of it might be part of your kids’ haul. But they’re still sleeping, and besides, you want them to live a healthy life.

You’re such a good parent.

Eat their candy.

Step 2

On November 1, show up to work and go to the kitchen. Wow, that’s a lot of candy. Eat the candy.

Bonus points if you say “TRICK OR TREAT!” and get a halfhearted laugh.

Bonus points if you mention how much you’ll have to work out later.

Eat the candy until you’re super sick and have to go home.

Step 3

There are no more steps. Enjoy adult trick or treating. It’s so much easier and so much less fun.

Acknowledgement

Big shoutout to jdot for this tweet that got me nodding and thinking.