Travel. Adventure. Trekking. Journey. Nepal.
The Journey to Nepal — Ad Astra
Part one of my two and half months on the roof of the world
I wrote a post a month ago sharing my first two weeks’ experience of my 75 days in Nepal from March 3 to May 17, 2021. Looking at it now, it only tells a part of the true story. Over the course of the coming months, I will share with you my experience travelling to Nepal for what became a two-and-a-half-month spiritual, mental and physical awakening. I’m going to be vulnerable and honest while also being unwavering and raw. After 32 circuits around the sun, I departed from the stability of my life and career to blaze a new trail within the forests of my ethereal conscience in Nepal. My hope is that a spark from my blaze may help kindle the quiet fire within yourself toward building the future you want, unapologetically.
No story is complete without first discussing the foundations that made it possible. All travels start with a fleeting thought that turns into a whisper which turns into a voice as loud as conscious ringing interminably and demanding change. My own fleeting thoughts began in June of 2020 after I decided to let go of my apartment in the East Village of Manhattan after six years of living there. It had been the only place I had ever lived in NYC and the second longest abode after my family home outside Philadelphia, where I was returning to. It was the only decision I could make, and, in an instant, I became what I thought I wouldn’t: an exile.
The 2020 COVID-19 pandemic brought so much change, far faster than I anticipated. However, I planned my exile to be temporary with the intent of returning and getting my own space in New York by Fall 2020. Upon being uprooted, the political tensions in the country that poured into my family couldn’t have been higher. With the murder of George Floyd, the conversation of race and acceptance became stances you took in the sand with fists raised, stubborn, rather than conversations on how to address these disparities, civilly.
Politics in the family became this vicious cycle of pent-up silence on a topic resulting in a volcanic firefight that ended in cooled down apologies, only to be repeated three to four weeks later. There were hardly any targeted comments. Instead, differences showed themselves in even the slightest gestures, which began like a pebble down a mountain, soon becoming an avalanche toward argument. I’d wake multiple times a week in the middle of the night in a panic on how these differences came to be. While being home was rejuvenating and nostalgic, I found it also exhausting and anxiety-inducing. I needed a change.
Home life aside, I would be remiss to exclude that I was gainfully employed and doing quite well, given a global pandemic. I had been working in corporate retail for six and a half years with a very steady company. I had a job title and salary I was proud of, working with a great group of people. But it just never felt right. In my successes I opened many doors, yet I still couldn’t help but feel held back. I wanted more and I never felt like I was looked at fondly for it. I’d be encouraged to push for more and go higher, but only within the appropriate corporate parameters. As with other things, this became a cycle of me trying to push beyond the bounds only to be kept within until the energy I outputted was tame enough and channeled to push me up the corporate ladder.
Reminiscing on calmer days to cool my worries, I remembered my time in New Zealand in 2018 when I took a solo trip to Middle-Earth to see the landscapes that captivated me as a child from Peter Jackson’s adaptation of The Lord Of The Rings. From the silent beaches of Karekare to the indomitable majesty of the Doubtful Sound, I wondered what the process would be to live in such a country? One of the best ways I found was to get into the travel industry. I had done some decent traveling in my time on this rock, but I never knew how to get into the industry. Furthermore, what could I offer or do?
And then I saw it, Pure Exploration. The name itself was evocative. This company offered 3-month Adventure Guide Programs certifying students in Trekking, Climbing, River Rescue, and Wilderness First Aid. That all sounded great, but could I really give up my corporate career for 3 months? I didn’t think so. But then I saw something grander in the full year program. This Outdoor Instructor Program would be broken into three semesters, 1st doing a 3-month Adventure Guide Program, 2nd interning and learning how to build an Adventure Guide Program, and 3rd attending an Adventure Guide Program as an assistant director. I was very intrigued now.
Upon speaking with the company, I learned I could go on to do guiding with them or start my own company after completion of this program. How cool is that? To me, this is what I was seeking, something wild and fresh, something that mirrored and complemented my passions for travel and learning. If I ever thought to own my own company or build programs/trips of my own, it would be one that blends together tourism, immersion, discovery, and education. I want to give people a sense of freedom and place in their power the ability to feel as though they are an adventurer of old. Whether it be wandering the streets of old Constantinople or seeking the hidden glaciers of the mountains.
After countless back and forth calls with the company and consulting confidants in my family and friend circles, all while on a 6-week road trip through the American Rockies, I decided to pull the trigger and go for it. My steady, comfortable path with a foreseeable future quickly became one of uncertainty, discomfort, and excitement. I remember the term “Turning Point” always standing out to me in my high school history books for big events that changed the course of history. This shift would certainly go down as a turning point in my history book. To where did I turn?
I selected my 3-month Adventure Guide Program semester to be in Nepal. I wanted to go as far from home as I had ever been. While Nepal wouldn’t be the furthest I’d go physically, but it would soon be the furthest I’d go mentally and spiritually.
I have always been fixated with the explorer Percy Fawcett. His journeys into the unknown of South America to draw the borders of Bolivia and Brazil evolving into seeking the Lost City Of Z rhapsodize me every time I think of them. I wanted so much to feel just a drop from the endless flowing river of his experiences, and Nepal is where I saw my best opportunity.
As my new journey began to take form, the time came to put to rest nine years of professional life. I came to my company 6.5 years ago lost and in need of stability, which they gave me. When I started, I thought the ranks of those higher than me were unattainable and, at the end of it all, I was leaving amongst those ranks. I won’t say I didn’t have setbacks — I did. I was hired a level below what I applied for and then, after 11 months of good performance, I was held back from being promoted due solely to not being with the company for 12 months. I was told the way I wrote had too much fluff and to stop writing lengthily in favor of quick, to-the-point emails executives could read quickly and make decisions from. However, all said and done, I will not say I wasn’t sad to leave. My boss alongside all of my coworkers took my departure with grace in the knowledge that I was pursuing a passion of mine and not a pay raise with a competitor.
My time in Nepal was set to begin on January 29, 2021. With confirmation that it was green lit for that date by Pure Ex, I left my career on November 25. One month later the program to Nepal would be delayed until March 3, due to uncertainties surrounding the UK variant of COVID. I originally wanted two months to prepare. One month for seeing family and friends during the Christmas holiday and the other to continue to focus on building my rock climbing skills, which were next to nothing. The bonus month of February was welcomed as my climbing skills were not near where I wanted them to be before Nepal.
I spent the final two months focusing on climbing, reading, meditating, and preparing to say goodbye. As the months turned to weeks and the weeks turned to days, March 3 was nearly here. The concept of travelling seemed as foreign to me as the place I was traveling to, given all that the pandemic had done to suppress it. Compared to other places I had been, where friends had been, or I had read or seen photos of…I knew almost nothing about Nepal. I knew the Himalayas were there and that Hinduism and Buddhism were the main faiths, but not much more besides. I was beginning to feel like a true adventurer, like an astronaut headed for outer space. I was going somewhere no one I knew had gone before, somewhere beyond the ranges of my life where everything I would encounter would be different from home, save the basic principles of our shared humanity.
Flying from Philadelphia to Chicago to Doha to Kathmandu, I’d soon be spending about 28 hours of travel getting to Nepal. For reasons I could not articulate, my emotions were running wild. The path was beginning to take shape in front of me. It was real and it was here. There would be no turning back, no drive home, no one to come and visit me, just me and my soon-to-be teammates alone in Nepal, pushing the limits of our beings. Additionally, with time zones flipped an awkward 9 hours and 45 minutes from Eastern Time and poor cell phone service, communicating with family and friends was going to be limited to early morning and late evening communications, if any.
The goodbyes were far more challenging than I anticipated. With each hug goodbye another soft tear streamed down my cheek. In my time in Pennsylvania, so focused on the start of this journey, it never occurred to me that I was replanting roots here at home. As I got out of the car with my parents at the airport, which felt more like a launch pad, we hugged and cried for the final goodbyes. With the plane engines roaring, I closed my eyes and watched Pennsylvania fade away, not to be seen for another three months. At that moment, I reminded myself that this was my choice, and it was time for me to head to the stars of my dreams, Ad Astra.
To be continued…
Before leaving, on a blank page, I wrote an excerpt down from a poem:
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