Do Not Make Your Boyfriend as Your Camera Man
To all the girls who make their boyfriend a cameraman, it’s always a good idea to take a photo of them, too.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with your partner taking occasional photos of you. It might make people feel more connected to each other’s lives. But something is wrong. It’s worth talking about. It’s the compulsion to get pictures. There’s a problem with a compulsion that can ruin the moment.
Yup! We evaluate every experience based on the number of likes.
I am leaving it joyless.
Of course, we don’t all behave this way, but many more do. Some (Some not All) Girlfriends demand this, and friends and family do, too. It’s common.
I don’t mean to mock you here. Every technological and commercial incentive tempts Gen Z to do this. People focus on the attention of the importance of their faces, bodies, and personal brands. They learn to associate their self-worth with virtual validation. Yes, it’s become normal; no wonder we defend it. But, considering the size of the situation, this is a lot of work.
It’s not trivial that the need to document the perfect memory can harm it. This happened when we watched the sunset on the beach. It turned into an argument after you demanded Instagram photos. You needed help to get the angle right. It’s not good. Some people sacrifice their real-world reputation to improve their online one. These things matter.
Think about it. How often have you seen a beautiful moment only to pull out your phone and start taking pictures? Capturing and sharing the experience confirms it. But the very act of documenting can strip away the moment’s joy. We want to, but in trying so hard to capture the memory, we miss out on living it.
Excessive photo-taking can impair memory. People who took photos had worse recall. This was compared to those who only observed the objects. Taking a photo means we outsource our memory to the device. This makes us less likely to remember it well.
Turning your partner into a perpetual photographer transforms your relationship into something transactional. It’s no longer about happiness and experiences. It’s what one person can do for the other. This can breed resentment. A relationship loses intimacy when it becomes about perfect Instagram shots.
On Mother’s Day, I witnessed a girl yelling at her partner because he couldn’t capture her perfect angle on camera. I wondered what the point was, considering she would likely edit the footage anyway.
Again, that’s fine if your partner is taking photo of you.
But…
I became annoyed. I never noticed this girl taking a photo of her boyfriend or of them together. Perhaps she did take his photo, but I didn’t see it. I considered offering to take a picture of them both, but given the girl’s attitude, I chose not to approach.
Social media constantly bombards us with images of perfection. Influencers and celebrities set unrealistic standards, and we feel pressured to keep up. This pressure can lead to an unhealthy relationship with our online persona. We’ve started to value ourselves based on likes and comments, and we’ve lost sight of our intrinsic worth.
A partner might feel unappreciated if they are always behind the camera, missing out on enjoying moments together. This will lead to feelings of inadequacy and frustration.
The cycle measures our experiences by online engagement, not personal fulfillment.
Engaging fully with our surroundings and the people we care about is the best way to create memories. Instead of getting the perfect shot, we should create meaningful moments.
When you look back on your life, what will matter are the laughs, talks, and trips you share. The number of likes your photos get is different.
Cherish the people who share these moments with you. Make sure they feel seen and appreciated, not just as your photographer but as your equal partner.
Turn the camera around the next time you are tempted to ask your partner to take another photo. Capture the moment from a different angle. Could you include them in the frame? Better yet, put the camera away and enjoy the experience together. Create memories that are not just visually documented but emotionally enriching.
A healthy relationship is a two-way street. It involves reciprocity, providing support, and giving mutual respect. You may unintentionally take more than you give, which is important. Make sure your partner feels as valued as you do.
Therefore, all the girls who pose for their boyfriends’ cameras should also take a photo of them. Better yet, set aside the camera occasionally and engage in the moment. The most beautiful memories are those we live with, not just those we capture.
If this is you, I hope you understand.
Thanks for taking the time to read. I’d like to hear your perspective.
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