Do People Get Tired of Each Other With Time?
Growing fond of someone.
Where did the spark go?
When we meet people for the first time and get into a conversation with them, the pace at which we may connect with them can be so surprising.
Now I have so much to say and do. I just had a 2 hour conversation and they don’t even know my favourite meal yet.
“I can’t wait to tell you how much I love dogs, and what I do for work, and what makes me laugh, and my hobbies, and my….”
Sigh! What a good time! There is a lot more to say. It feels like such a huge connection. Where have you been all my life, you bozo!
With time, the decline pops out of the garbage bag as to the numerous things we have to say.
Less to say? Errr. * wiggles fingers *
It’s been 6 years now, and I do not only know your favourite food, I know all the meals you do not eat, I know all the funny and embarrassing experiences you have had. I can even complete your frequently overused sentences
I know so much.
Now what?
I start to grow fond of you? Grow out of love for you? Are we boring now? Or.. are we just not a good match anymore?
Or maybe, just maybe, that’s a completely normal thing between two individuals.
There is excitement in novelty
It is mostly people you don’t know so well you have a lot to say to, and feelings appear extreme in all parts of it. But feelings can go to its natural state with time.
It takes a lot of effort and intentionality to maintain excitement even after a very long time.
You can be excited about certain things, and not be as much with some others over time.
The chances of getting involved in tough times with someone who you do not know is slim.
You are less likely to be bothered about disagreements or talking about negative parts of yourselves from the start. Maybe even argue. Not yet.
At that stage, we are much more comfortable and our vulnerabilities and flaws can be clouded by the excitement and attention.
But hey!
We need to look beyond the fleeting gush of emotions that come with having to spend time with someone, knowing there’s still so much to say and do, because one day you may think you have less to say.
it isn’t usually the case. Even if it appears that you have known large chunks of each individual.
Prioritise values above feelings.
As human beings, we are constantly growing, changing, and evolving with time. Every day, we encounter different people and experiences that shape our perspectives and help us gain a better understanding of the world around us.
It is only natural for us to seek knowledge and try to keep up with our minds, as we strive to become better versions of ourselves. Through learning and self-improvement, we can continue to evolve and grow as individuals, both intellectually and emotionally.
And as we grow, we have a little extra thing to share each time.
You stay connected by the dynamics and agreements you set in the relationship, and how you both keep working to improve the relationship. We get into friendships and relationships so we can share parts and all of our lives with them.
We keep up with our love for our partners and friends by regular evaluation and introspection, to be aware of where we are at, how we have come, and how to keep improving where necessary. .
Sometimes, getting tired of one’s partner can be a serious issue, that needs an open communication. But for the most part of it, it’s pretty normal.
Just focus on building a relationship with priority to values, than placing feelings above values.
