POEM
Lessons From My Dad
A Heartfelt Father’s Day Tribute
The thick, dark clouds
released sprinkles
to hide my tears.
“Dad, if our conversation
included honesty,
maybe you’d tell me
why you weren’t there.
I won’t take it out on you
what mom took out on me.
Mom slapped my face
because she saw your reflection.
I won’t take it out on you.
I just want to hear it from you
and I’ll be fine.
What could be worse than
dying inside for forty-five years?
I played ball without your pitch.
But I caught hell in the rearview mirror.
Fights and a bad reputation
had me placed in a private school,
and girls became my death pin.
Mom said I was a lot like you.
Is it true?
You won’t answer,
but I wanted to say it.
There must have been
somewhere better to be
and of that place
I’d love to see the city lights
from your lips to my ears.
I’d swallow the bitterness
you regretfully bestowed
upon me.
The fun you must have had,
the lives blessed by your touch,
and the people you must have met
must have formed opinions about your
absence.
I hope they had their names
in movie credits; show me
their films if you’d like.
More than anything,
I want you to know
that I forgive you.
Mom had her side,
I just wanted to know yours.
But for now, I’ll say goodbye.”
I tossed a rose on his gravestone,
holding my son’s hand on Father’s Day.
“He wants to know about you.
I’ll tell him what I knew.
You taught me never to give up on hope;
I hoped to find you, and I found us.
I love you, Dad.”
(© 2024 AC)
(Amazon Kindle, Spillwords, The Writers Club)
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