Why Do Bad Words Stick More Than Good Words?
You’ve been there before.
Well-dressed, and full of confidence. And as you leave for an occasion, your spouse and kids tell you how good you look.
You then step out to meet another person who gives you a weird look. “Your dress looks odd on you,” they say with a sincere but grungy look.
You shrug it off, but that comment doesn’t leave you.
Others may have complimented you, but that one bad feedback stands out.
It leaves a bad taste in your mouth that no amount of good words can wash away.
Why?
Why do negative words impact people more?
The other day, my writing got critiqued by a fellow writer.
It hurt a little, but I was grateful for it.
The next day, I got a comment that appreciated that same writing.
The comment gushed about my writing style and appreciated my work. It made me smile, but the critique I received earlier still sat atop my head.
I wasn’t feeling bad, like a sit-in-the-corner kinda bad. It was a sly feeling that wouldn’t go away.
Words are powerful. Bad words especially dig a deep hole in our heads because we’re fear-prone.
We want to be perceived perfectly.
We don’t want people to see a bad side of us.
It washes down our credibility.
It affects other’s perception.
We care what people think. And a “bad” comment could mean someone thinks poorly of you.
The Solution
Be intentional about the truth.
And the truth is, one negative comment, feedback, or word, doesn’t mean you’re all bad.
It means you’re human.
It also means other people are humans.
They have their filtered views and dented perceptions.
What they say doesn’t mean they are “all right”.
Life has two sides, the negative and the positive.
We tend to pick, focus, and make the negative into our reality, neglecting the positive. Reconcile these two realities together — the good and the bad.
One bad doesn’t erase the good.
And one good doesn’t erase the bad.
So next time you get something that leaves a sour taste in your mouth, appreciate it, accept it as normal, and know that it doesn’t make you less.
Instead, it is a call to get better.
If you feel like someone’s feedback is wrong, discard it. That person is human.
His thinking could be flawed.
Thanks for reading 👏🏽
Hi, my name’s Deborah. If you enjoyed this story, check out my profile for more stories. And don’t forget to clap 👏🏼, and share with a friend — sharing is caring 🕊.
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