Obìnrin bi Okùnrin
A woman like a man
The first time someone called me this was at work when I wanted to change out our office's drinking water container. No sooner had I lifted the plastic had a visitor to our office shut me down, saying, “Why are you doing that?” Pointing to my male colleague, he says, “Carry that thing from her.”
My colleague turns to me, laughs, and continues his work saying, “Obinrin bi Okunrin ni Blessing” translated as, “Blessing is a woman like a man.” The visitor was stunned, but I’m glad he said nothing else until I had completely put in the new water container.
Women are not invalids.
I do not want to be seen as a man, only as a woman; that title is enough glory for me. I do not want to be seen as inadequate because I’ve got two protruding breasts and a vagina rather than a penis. I want to be acknowledged as strong enough to carry a 20-liter water container. I am not frail. I want to have the choice to ask for your help, if and when I need it and not be judged as weak even before I speak. I don’t want to be overlooked when there’s a bulb that needs changing, while you go out to look for the nearest man; I learned how to fix bulbs even before physics class. Don’t ask me “What do you need money for?” when I ask for a pay raise, because I am female, young, and single; productivity is what matters here.
Women have been reduced to claiming Male and King, to appear strong, but I refuse that.
I am Woman, a queen, and strong, all in one.
The other day as I was shutting down my laptop for the day’s work, my mum calls saying “Nnem, our socket does not work anymore.” She did not call my brothers, she called me because that is how we were trained in my home, to have basic knowledge about almost everything; dishes and home device maintenance. I came home, touched some wires and it worked. That’s what happens when you believe in women, we blow your mind; even when you do not believe in us, we still delight in blowing your mind.
Be kind to everyone, male and female. Do not reserve your supposed kindness and helping hand for women only like our gender has conferred some sort of infirmity on us.
She was powerful not because she wasn’t scared but because she went on so strongly, despite the fear.” – Atticus
