Choosing Me
A Poem
Viscera,
kick, jolt
I won’t be spastic this time
when you kick me
stomach, gallbladder, liver
muscle and fascia
underneath my skin
I could see it in your eyes
hear it in your tone
words without the
ready to play
weaponize
while your body was still, at remove
I felt a kick, zap, jolt
in my preciousless space
yea,
viscera to viscera
but someone started that pernicious
blind game
fuck it, just
yea fuck it you angry beast
shatter my glass castle
and I’ll massage your
organs with
real dodgeball game of sturdiness
give me the back and forth
the truth to truth
let's stop only when we drop
cleansing out that toxic gray shit
that lies behind our filmy eyes
give me that good stuff
I like that
kick
when I can kick back
yea ping pong motherfucker
you cool,
sturdy,
cat
Don’t wash away
my perceptions
with your blighting niceties
nice tie, nice suit, nice job
my adolescent yearning
they us it’s a wrecking ball
but, yeah it’s a garden oasis
color me mine! I begged
color, me, mine. more
all that truth I
needed to want
didn’t get
You sever me each time
you wash my eyes
Let me play
I’d say, in a faintly sigh
that just won’t do
see sizzling senses
organic realness
it’s not
a hot potato
(but what is it besides my
stupid phallic substancessless diagnosis wrapped
wrapped in
rage wrapper in wrath
wrapped in selfish lack of depth and
imagination)
when you kick me
jolt me
zap me
from deep inside
oh let me exercise
play
and righteous anger
dude
ours.
opaque stardust pills sometimes,
ok?
anyway.
this way
the way
is too sturdy, not opaque
not awash in
an opalescent
kid glove on hand and
and grimy kid fascia over the heart
just, make me sturdy with our
animal faith
in the real
cuz, sometimes I smell sweet
bullshit all around
But, listen
a kick in the fucking gut
is no joke
it’s a life.