In Defense of Doom Scrolling

It’s appalling. Damning the collective act so humble.

Image co-created by author and Image Creator after prompting endlessly.

Have you ever felt the waves of wisdom gushing inside your brain during the pre-scrolling era?

Never, you nincompoop.

If not, what constitution gives you the right to point the finger at the humble act of Doom Scrolling?

Doom scrolling is a non-living messiah for the already doomed human race.

It allows you to read and feel how utterly f*cked you are.

Shouldn’t that be discounted as insight?

On the contrary, you christen it as ‘doom-scrolling’? What gives you the audacity to make such a bold step to change human perception?

You are on a slander spree. Bitching and still philandering with it, like a belly-thumping dude who’d check out women when they bend for Namaskar mudra and later slut shame for ‘having’ a cleavage. Really?

I know you do the same: You check out Instagram, FB, TikTok, and Snapchat and then rant over the digital discourse young things are exposed to, wasting their precious youth, energy, and time.

Get over, you single cellular organism.

Doom Scrolling is the only source of instant gratification in the world burgeoning with anxiety and depression.

Remember: it’s. Non-living messiah?

Moreover, we’ve all been through this, so stop acting prissy, you dollop of intertwined neurons.

Raise your hand if you ever knew that you could make curd from chickpea milk. Let alone soy milk.

If you knew that Germany had changed its national Anthem’s words and kept the same beat, raise your hand.

Raise your hand when you’ve seen your kids gaining a wealth of knowledge under the covers of the blanket. And swear that you failed to give.

Raise your hand if you know that there’s a place in the Universe called Bootes Void. And if you were dropped in between this Great-Nothing-void-thingy, you’d keep aimlessly walking into complete darkness forever.

Scary huh?

If you knew, Will Smith and Jada are getting divorced, raise your hand.

If you knew sour is bread and not temper, RAISE YOUR HAND!

If not for doom scrolling, your IQ would have been aimlessly chasing you, just like lost astronaut chasing signposts in Bootes Void.

If not for the messiah DS, you would be left out of all the precious information like a half-son left out of inherited wealth.

Unfortunately, DS attracted negative labeling when humankind was in the people-pleasing phase and was climbing the rungs of the higher digital self. Those were the days when we had to come up as strait-laced saints who nourished their bodies biologically, chemically, emotionally, and sexually just to decay into dust one fine day.

The days of that fastidious morality are bygone.

Now is the era of Ubermensch- a super race- that keeps a tab on politics, religion, race, color, and food.

Simply put we are Armchair judges, helping the world to function in a more civilized way. Keeping a check on the values, traditions, and purity.

Moreover, DS allows younger generations to be on their own. So much so that Gen Z can confide to DS than to their parents.

Imagine the degree of attachment and attention. Ouch!

And who do you think enables all these superpowers to humanity?
Elon Musk?
No! No! No! You dramatic baffoon.

Elon Musk is into Spaceships and something, mostly. Yeah?!

If not for doom scrolling, you’d still be an average, gauche human.

Remember: The World is becoming an unstable habitat, and doom-scrolling is the only way to keep a tab!