Self-Analysis- A Summary
For Neurotic individuals.
I just finished reading the book, “Self-analysis” by Karen Horney, M.D, a book that I wanted to read for a long time and which has lived up to my expectation. In my opinion, she was one of the few psychoanalysts who could give so many insights into a neurotic personality, and thank god for her, I now have a good grasp of what a neurotic personality can look like to other people. She also emphasized that any person who is willing to change their neurotic personality is already trying to do so by reading her books.
A neurotic person usually tries to live up to the expectations in his head, tries to set goals for himself, attains them and if they fail in the venture of their goals, they either want to die because they don’t feel they are deserving if not achieved their goals and if they reach their goals, the expectation of joy that people around them should be if it doesn’t match to the one in their head leads to a massive disappointment, depression, anxiety, resentment, etc, all which leads in a downward spiral in Life.
She mentioned in the book that, a neurotic is grasped by the will to achieve something, it is the unconscious force that propels someone towards or away from a goal. People tend to think that they are under the influence of goal but it’s not the goal which has got them, it’s the will that is driving them there. Usually, the neurotic patient thinks that things in Life are good, bad, or unalterable.
You can say to some degree that, first, they use Imagination to save themselves, then there are problems arising out of illusions that they have created for themselves, furthermore, one needs to entangle themselves from their illusions and finally, one needs to reach their true Self otherwise, it will lead to the deterioration of the human being. I mean what is Life, if nothing, but to realize who you are deep down and to utilize the best of the abilities given to you?
Self-analysis can offer many insights rather than just doing occasional self-analysis, with the help of analysts. The occasional analysis helps but the person who can observe oneself every time is you and imagine the benefits self-analysis could reap, if one could only observe and identify their desires, habits, rituals, etc and see what factors, memories gave rise to it. She offers insight into the problems dealt with, by her patient named Clare, the problems of her relationships, the job sometimes and more importantly, about herself, which took 4 years to resolve and also how her dreams were insightful, how she asked good questions and expressed herself and her emotions using free associations, without once thinking that whether the diary will be read by posterity or not, as many humans drift away for posthumous fame. Clare only resolved to find her true ‘Self’, which was a lot of work but hopefully, worth the effort. She explained how the neurotic factors are interrelated among each other and they entangle themselves quite after time. She also remarked that it’s funny that solutions are made aware, of not when one is involved in thinking and not by the continuous rampage of questions within a mind but in the calm, soothing frame of mind.
“What matters is the spirit and not the rules.” — Karen Horney
Finally, the resistance to identify to find faults within oneself has mentioned because how many of us would like to face the monster that lies within us? Resistance will be developed by an individual while trying to get to the root cause of the problem because the neurotic has developed not only primary forces but also secondary forces to deal with Life and it is so incorporated into one’s personality such that resistance will be guaranteed by the individual. To know oneself is a boon, to know that one can change is great and to work towards our own self-development is the greatest accomplishment in Life. How to know when one has developed resistance? You will stop going to an answer which you have reached, you will give excuses, reasons as to why you cannot go deeper than the analysis you have achieved, and after some time, avoid the problem entirely. In such cases, one must take a break and come visit the problem with a fresh perspective.
The final chapter deals with the limitations of Self-analysis which involve resisting the temptations, obstructions faced which resolving issues within oneself, and in some cases, it also means thinking that now once has this problem, they will be adhering to it or thinking they do not have the ability to cope or change or cannot go through it alone, however, that obstruction in itself is the very problem that should be removed, but the patient may lose sight of it. It also deals with whether the analysis will be stopped ever and whether human beings can be perfect or not, to which the author takes a neutral approach by saying that Life is not simply successful attempts but also how much labor has been put into those values that one perseveres to inculcate within themselves.
So overall, analysis can be done by oneself, and occasionally, it’s better to take the help of an analyst since the limitations are greater when it comes to self-analysis but one cannot forget to take into consideration the benefits that self-analysis provides in the long run. In the psychoanalytical approach, the main emphasis has always been the development of the patient on his own rather than handing the solution.
When I was reading Modern Man in Search of a Soul by Carl Jung, I remember him describing neurosis as a person who has an overwhelming present and a difficult past/childhood, and therefore, he had to resort to imagination to save themselves and when awareness was made, this gave rise to neurosis within the individual. I agree with him, maybe because I have suffered a bit of these things in me too but I won’t resort to the generalization that just because I had a difficult past so now that it will be a reason that I will have to be difficult now. Some days it is difficult, but I am grateful for those days and the people who support me during those times. Finally, I have faith in this quote.
“Neurosis is Self-cure”— Carl Jung
If you like this post and want to know more, the books that I recommend reading are: (They are free pdfs)