snapshot ofsome of my NVALT notes

How I write

And how I fail to.

stacy-marie ishmael
2 min readJun 18, 2013

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I ‘write’ in my head first, and constantly. Subject lines and headlines. Ledes and sentences. Paragraphs. Whole letters, essays, emails. My mind is an alphabet soup.

I’ve rewritten emails a half-dozen times before ever touching the keyboard, the consequence of which is more often unsent, ancient drafts than it is exquisite, effective electronic prose.

I’ve been posting words to the web since FTP was still a thing. Those entries still exist, on various blogs with a template that look very much like a .txt file (with an occassional animated gif; it was the Old Days, after all). Those words are suffused with teenage angst and a few too many references to lyrics by Linkin Park and System of a Down.

I own quills and ink and sealing wax, and I know how to use them. I’ve discussed the esoteric merits of different types of nibs over tea. I write letters with these nibs and inks and wax seals, although insufficiently often to ever actually use all of the stationery I’ve so painstakingly and expensively acquired over the years.

I have been known to unironically compliment someone on her choice of card stock. No one ever replies with an American Psycho reference. More’s the pity.

I’ve tried possibly every minimalist word processor known to Steve and man, and I flirt with Jekyll and Markdown.

With my reporter hat on I’d take copious notes in my leftie-scrawl-cum-shorthand, filling notebooks, napkins and the backs of business cards with whos, whats, whens, whys, wheres and how much $ (this was financial reporting, after all).

I write because I am compelled to. The words that find their way into notebooks (unlined, ideally) and pixels come from places I cannot quite identify. Sometimes the words pour out of me faster than I can think-write-type; sometimes the pages remain stubbornly blank, the cursor forlorn while deadlines menace.

Is there anything quite like the unknown of a blank page?

I write because I don’t know how not to.

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stacy-marie ishmael

Trinidadian-at-large. Galavanteur. Live at the intersection of media and technology.