The Clueless Divorcee
Figures out a way to organize his life
The morning sun glinted off the windshield as Joe’s car merged onto the highway, the speakers humming with classic rock from his iPhone. Brad, his buddy, was enjoying the music with closed eyes. They were looking forward to a relaxing morning on the links.
Joe’s phone buzzed with an incoming call. It was his ex, Karen. He dismissively waved it away. “Not a chance, Karen.”
Moments later, it rang again, more insistent this time. Joe rolled his eyes. “Persistent as always.” He tapped the steering wheel control. “Yeah?”
The gentle, familiar voice flooded the car. “Joe, honey, I just wanted to make sure you took your blood pressure medication this morning.”
Joe exchanged a look with Brad. “Uh, yes dear, I’ve got it covered.”
“And where are you right now?” Karen’s voice carried a melodic lilt.
“I’m with Brad. We’re headed to the golf course.”
“Well, hello there, Brad!” The chipper greeting made Brad flinch.
“Hey…” He forced an awkward wave, then mouthed ‘Karen?’ at Joe with raised eyebrows.
“Oh!” Her tone brightened. “Are you boys playing eighteen or just doing nine and a skins game?”
“Full eighteen, if space allows,” Joe replied. “But I’ll be back before five.”
“Wonderful, I’ll order your favorite for dinner — seared ahi and grilled asparagus. Drive safe!”
“Will do.” The corner of Joe’s mouth turned up slightly. “Love you, Kar.”
“Love you too, Joe.”
The call disconnected, and Brad’s confused stare bore into Joe. After a prolonged silence, he finally spoke up. “Okay, you’ve gotta fill me in here, man. I had no clue you and Karen were back together!”
Joe kept his eyes on the road, his expression unreadable. “That wasn’t actually Karen.”
Brad’s brow furrowed. “But she sure as hell sounded like her…”
Joe turned to Brad. “Ok, I’ll tell you the truth but you have to keep it to yourself. I… I created a digital version of Karen using AI.”
A beat passed as Brad processed this. Then he blurted out, “You know it’s illegal to create an AI version of a living person?”
A rueful grin tugged at Joe’s lips. “I know. But I didn’t have a choice. Karen ran every aspect of my life. After we separated, I was clueless — missed appointments, unpaid bills, expired licenses, the whole nine yards.”
Understanding dawned on Brad’s face as they pulled into the course. “So you…recreated her to keep your life organized?”
“Exactly.” Joe killed the engine.
They climbed out, and Brad shook his head in amazement. “Of all the guys to end up with an AI ex-wife….you’re probably the only one who could make it work.”
Joe’s laughter echoed across the sun-drenched fairway. “The future’s looking bright, my friend.”
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