What Lies Within
A Satirical Short Story
Glenn’s resume sparkled like a shining gem. It dazzled with testimonies of academic excellence, boasting of Glenn’s crowning achievement as the top graduate of his rigorous Harvard MBA program. Delving deeper, it communicated an insatiable thirst for knowledge and a remarkable intellect, evidenced by his enrollment in graduate level courses ranging from artificial intelligence to strategic planning to real estate investing. It spoke of impressive and coveted internships, reflecting unwavering determination and exceptional skills. And as the cherry on top, it listed published works in the prestigious Harvard Business Review.
And all before age 24.
As graduation day approached, Glenn translated his impressive resume into a plethora of interviews. Not just from any run-of-the-mill companies, but from the crème de la crème of consulting firms, the ones that every ambitious MBA student yearned to work for. Coveted firms — Bain, McKinsey, Boston Consulting Group, Deloitte, PricewaterhouseCoopers — each one a beacon of success and prestige. To his delight, each interview ended with a tempting job offer.
These companies were desperate for what Glenn had to offer, ready to go to any lengths to secure his talents. He could have easily played them off against one another to create a bidding war, but for Glenn, it was never just about the salary. No, he engaged in dialogues with each hiring manager, eager to learn about specific clients, projects, and roles that they could offer. Before making any decisions, he arranged follow-up conversations with practice partners and project directors, determined to gather as much information as possible.
“I want to truly understand the roles and responsibilities I might expect if I join your team,” he said confidently.
Eager to win over such a top candidate, each company bent over backwards to accommodate Glenn’s requests. They were all clamoring to work with him, to put his unmatched credentials to worthy use on client problems.
Bain was tackling a set of complex network and supply chain problems for Anheuser-Busch, helping them navigate through excess capacity after their buyout by InBev. They needed to determine which plants to shut down and how to consolidate bottle suppliers and regional distributors.
McKinsey was working with Google on a revolutionary new project — the development of autonomous cars, powered by hydrogen fuel cells. They were in need of a partner for manufacturing in Asia. And they sought strategies for standing up “water electrolysis” plants, used to split water molecules into hydrogen and oxygen.
Boston Consulting Group had the trust of Disney’s real estate development arm, with the mission of locating regional amusement parks near bustling population centers. Certainly, Glenn’s expertise in real estate and strategic planning would be invaluable in securing the perfect locations without driving up property prices prematurely.
Surprisingly, these top consulting firms were willing to divulge confidential information to an exceptional candidate like Glenn, recognizing that it was crucial to have the brightest minds working for them and prevent them from joining rival companies. “Our strength lies in attracting brilliant minds like yours,” one hiring manager told Glenn, hoping to flatter him. Other hiring managers expressed similar sentiments.
But after being courted by the top brass of each organization, Glenn made a shocking decision — he turned down all the offers. Every single one of them. With graciousness and finesse, he conveyed different reasons to each suitor and sent customized emails, politely leaving doors open for potential collaboration in the future.
However, if you want the truth, Glenn had never been seeking employment. He was not an MBA student. Or an undergraduate student for that matter. His name was not even Glenn. He had cleverly used these interviews to obtain competitive secrets about clients of these companies, strategizing his future investments in their suppliers and real estate positions in their affected markets. He bought option “calls” in suppliers and properties he expected to be winners, and he bought option “puts” in those he expected would be losers.
Glenn, or whatever his name was, did have a knowledge of artificial intelligence, but it was limited to using tools like ChatGPT to create fabricated resumes and cover letters that impeccably matched the job postings of each company. He used the same technology to craft rejection letters, cunningly keeping doors ajar for future opportunities with each organization.
He would have reason to tap into his connections at these firms in the future. After growing his investing company’s net worth to a billion dollars, he’d need help in taking it to the next level. He invited his contacts at these top firms to propose consulting projects they might undertake to double his returns over the next couple of years.
These firms were willing to assemble their top talent on proposal teams to prepare and present bids for work with new clients. But Glenn turned down all the proposals. Every single one of them. On a consulting basis anyway. Through their proposals, he was able to identify the crème-de-la-crème talent at each firm so that he could hire them away to work for him directly. It was the best way to get top talent. He wasn’t about to trust the credentials of potential employees found through traditional resume searches.
Thank you for reading my story. If you are inclined, please clap for me, follow me, and join my email list. I write stories like this every week.
