WP3 (Revision): Music & Family In My Life
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Music and my family are at the core of who I am. One cannot exist without the other. The sacrifices that my parents made are what allowed me to pursue music in the first place. My dad made so many sacrifices just so that I could be born here and so that the family could be continued in the US. If he had not done that, I would not be able to pursue my passion for music the way I am today. And music is the way that I can communicate my feelings most freely. It’s essential to who I am because from the time I started playing guitar until now, this has been my go-to outlet of expression when words have failed. But it’s only possible through the way that I was raised.
My parents are the foundation that allowed me to get into music in the first place. I come from an immigrant family, so I didn’t have much growing up. And one of the most important reasons why I can make music everyday, is because of my parents and how they raised me. My parents have always encouraged me to follow my dreams and passions from a young age. Whether I wanted to play soccer or be an actor, they have always allowed me to explore all of these things when they had the money and time. But they also punished me if I got bad grades or was rude to someone. And this showed me that there are checks and balances in life. It’s the same thing with my music today. I’ve learned about the many limits in the music industry which has helped me effectively communicate and collaborate with others. Having this ingrained in me by my parents helps me do better in the music world today. Going back to the first point, being able to try activities that I wanted to try has allowed me to take a shot at music, which is why I’m still doing it today. And I feel very lucky to have such open parents that brought me up this way. My parents and brother came to the US as immigrants. They had no family outside of Cuba so they were basically starting from zero. In fact, my dad sailed by himself from Cuba to Florida on a raft that he made out of tractor tires. He attempted many times to escape the communist government of Cuba once and finally did it. He knew in his heart that his family didn’t deserve to live this way. I even have the compass he used to get here. Every time I look at it, I am reminded of the efforts that my parents have made which now allows me to continue to pursue music.
We listened to a comedy show this semester by Solomon Giorgio that reminds me of my music. This show is called, “Homonegro Superior.” No, I’m not extremely funny or charming or anything like that. It’s more about the way that he puts so much intention and passion into every word he says. It’s about the way that he speaks rather than the actual words he says. I could tell that the audience really felt his energy and resonated with it. It’s like they were sucked into the experience. This is always what I aim for in my music. In music, all of the greats have their own unique sound. You hear one note of Bob Dylan and you already know it’s him. It is unmistakable. Why? Because he has mastered the art of conveying all of his personality in a single note. Anyone could have played that note. But nobody can do it the way he did. There’s only one Bob Dylan, one Solomon Giorgio, one me, and one you. And it’s that aspect of the comedy show that I always strive to convey through music.
The thing that gives each person their identity and voice is authenticity. Everybody expresses their personality in different ways. Some people do it through dancing, some through writing, and some through acting. For me, it has always been music that allows me to do this. It lets me be my most genuine self. Everyday, I get to sit down and improvise on the guitar or make a beat on my laptop. And I just let out what whatever I feel needs to be let out of me on that particular day. Everyday is a different day and I feel a different way. Some days are rainy, some sunny. Some days it seems like everything and everyone is against me. And some days are straight up peaceful. All of these things affect the way that I feel which affects what kind of music comes out of me that day. I have found that many times I can’t express what I want to say through words, and that is why I turn to music. Music explains everything that I’m feeling without even having to say a word. And since no words are needed, you don’t have to speak the same language as me to understand. It’s a universal language.
Music is exactly like a drug to me. I need it when I’m feeling down and also when I feel great. It always seems to lift my mood or agree with me no matter what. A couple years back my grandma died from breast cancer. There was a period of grief in my family following that. All I would want to do is be in my room by myself playing my guitar. And when I wasn’t doing that, my headphones were on and I was listening to music. It’s what got me through those times In tragic times like those, there is nothing really to be talked about. No words could ever match up to the way we felt. But music can. It describes the indescribable. As always, when I can’t say it, I play it. It’s times like these that make music even more meaningful to me and it gives me yet another reason to continue doing it.
I’ve always thought pretty logically when it comes to life’s challenges. So I enjoy playing 8-ball pool and solving rubik’s cubes since they include geometry and physics. But I also like doing things that work the creative side of my brain like playing chess or table tennis. But music is particularly special to me because it has the best of both worlds. There’s the math side of it which is about intervals and how the mathematical distance between notes makes them sound pleasant to our ears; as well as different shapes on the fretboard and how they correlate to the pitches that come from playing them. Then there’s the creative side which is all about how you feel which impacts how the music flows out of you which affects how people feel when they hear it. This just hits me all at once when I listen to or play music. The best way I can describe it is that for a short period, it’s like all of your thoughts align and everything that you think about, see, or experience becomes more beautiful and exaggerated. If your friend tells you a joke, it’s ten times more funny. Music enlarges any ongoing experience. It makes me forget about everything but the present moment. Any problems just disappear for a while. It gives me a rush of serotonin that feels so good that it makes me think: how do I even deserve this? It’s like a warm blanket when you really need one. Alright, I’m having way too much fun with this! But it’s because music is both mathematical and creative that makes me so attached to it.
As for right now, I’ve been getting into music production a lot. In fact, I produce at least one song a day now, regardless of it being good or bad. This forces me to make music everyday and not worry about perfection. I say “forces” like I dread it, but it’s straight up fun! Before, what would hold me back the most in my music is being a “perfectionist.” Here’s a great quote from Gary Vaynerchuk: “Perfectionism is f***ing insecurity with lipstick on.” I love that because it’s so true. And I am guilty of this at times too. But it’s really just an excuse to not do something, at least in my experience. And on top of that, if I worry about something being perfect, I will never be satisfied and won’t enjoy it as much. I think imperfections are what make us human. So ever since I started producing months ago, I’ve been making music and posting it everyday to develop the mindset of, “progression, not perfection.” If you think about it, this is why the majority of people don’t put out their music ever. The truth is, there’s never going to be a perfect song. And I’ve learned that having a perfectionist mindset sucks the fun out of what you do. But if I make the goal to have fun, I can’t lose. Because now I’m enjoying the journey and not worried about the destination. How can I not be happy when I’m doing what I love best? I’ve only been doing it for 6 months at this point but I’ve been enjoying the process so much. So everyday I let whatever I’m feeling come out in the music. And the more raw and fresh it is the more authentic it comes out. Developing this mindset has made music more fun for me which just makes me want to keep doing it for years to come.
Another big thing that makes me me, is my patience. The ability to be super patient in today’s world I think is essential to growth in life. And I say “I think” a lot because I’m super young and I don’t know everything. I feel like a lot of people have huge goals or dreams and they just want to have them accomplished by tomorrow. And I’m also guilty of this at times. I mean who doesn’t want to live their dreams, right? But I think that the reality of the world is that that’s not possible. Goals take time, especially huge ones. I find that a shift in my mindset has really helped me with this in music lately. Life is long. That’s it. As soon as I realized that, life became a lot more enjoyable. Just think about it. Let’s say you’re 32-years-old, and you decide to try flipping houses for 4 years to see if you like it. But you end up getting super stressed and get burnt out. It feels like you just wasted 4 years of your life, right? Not really. You still haven’t lived through the first half of your life. Now you can switch to something else for the next 4 years and you’d still be young as heck! And really, you didn’t waste any time at all; any time spent trying out different things is time well spent. Also, you’ll be able to use the experience you gained from this in other areas of life. It’s all about how you look at it. As the great Gary Vee said, “life is all about perspective.” And I think this is so true. If you can just look at the glass half full instead of half empty, you’re already winning life. The more I grow, I try to look at life this way. Because of this shift in my mindset, I now have more patience to attack my goals in music more than ever before.
Regret is my greatest fear. This plays a big role in my personality and affects what I do everyday. The more I grow, the more I think about this idea. Can you imagine being in your 90’s and spending your last days being regretful for all that you could have done in your younger years? It’s what scares me the most, which is why I act accordingly. Whenever I can, I do things that scare or challenge me. I at least have to try it. Because if I don’t, I could spend the rest of my life wondering what could’ve happened. And who knows, trying that one thing could be the gateway to what you might do for the rest of your life. Because of this, I try as many things as I can in and outside of music without waiting to do them so that I can say I have experienced it.
With all of these things in mind, these are my experiences with music and my family. I hope my experiences can somehow help you to maybe look at life from a different angle. Or maybe it encourages you to try something new, or go harder at what you’re doing. These are the things that have shaped me into who I am today.
WORKS CITED:
“AIDS From Scratch.” YouTube, YouTube, 19 Oct. 2017, www.youtube.com/watch?v=9H0VOX1t4bU.
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-world/world/americas/cuba/article239735658.html
Krishnan, Reema. “The Functional Relationship Between Math And Music.” Disc Makers Blog, 9 July 2020, blog.discmakers.com/2020/07/the-functional-relationship-between-math-and-music/#:~:text=Math%20helps%20in%20reading%20music,tell%20us%20more%20about%20music.&text=This%20is%20comparable%20to%20mathematical,and%20a%20number%20of%20beats.
“5 Simple Habits That Will Turn You Into a Real Music Producer.” Production Music Live, www.productionmusiclive.com/blogs/news/5-simple-habits-that-will-make-you-a-real-music-producer.
Heshmat, Shahram. “Music, Emotion, and Well-Being.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 25 Aug. 2019, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/science-choice/201908/music-emotion-and-well-being#:~:text=Music%20has%20the%20ability%20to,alter%20mood%20or%20relieve%20stress.
Elizabeth Scott, MS. “How Your IPod Can Act as Your Therapist.” Verywell Mind, www.verywellmind.com/how-and-why-music-therapy-is-effective-3145190.
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Search Engine | Result. (2020, April 7). Gary Vee Search. https://search.garyvaynerchuk.com/result/904526
