The Difference Between My Brother and I
Now and then I find myself thinking about my brother. I consider our relationship, the type of person he is, his life choices, and his aspirations. I find it fascinating at times how different we are considering we are twins. Although the people we are today are a result of a lifetime of experiences, homelife as a child is incredibly important in development. I wanted to talk about how different we are considering we had a similar upbringing.
My brother and I were much alike when we were kids. Energetic, vocal, and loved to get involved with everyone. We were social butterflies as children, more so than the other children we were surrounded by. However, when we got home, our parents were always fighting and we had gotten accustomed to staying quiet in the house. We would often listen to their arguments until they got divorced.
Over the next 14 years following their divorce, we got used to staying with each parent on different days of the week. The schedule was confusing. Mondays, Thursdays, and the third weekend of the week with my mom. Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays until 1 pm with my dad on the other three weeks of the month. This took a toll on us, especially on my brother who was struggling with school and his social life. As the situation got worse, physical and emotional harm was done to both my brother and me, especially him.
As we grew, he became increasingly shy and anti-social. It was clear that our home life was affecting him. He would be extremely cautious with what he was doing, who he would talk to, and the things he would tell my parents. This was because he was afraid of what would happen to him if he did something “wrong”. We would be punished when we got bad grades or in trouble at school. Especially him because he found it harder to concentrate in school. I was quite the opposite, I would be cautious and shy away from telling my parents things, but I would try to be social otherwise. Although I had developed social anxiety, I thought it would be a good way to get my mind off the problems at home. My brother would join me at times, but he grew to be much more of an introvert than I was.
He found comfort in doing things he was good at it. He did not look into learning new things and experimenting. This was a direct result of the way we had been treated when we were children. Though most experiences were similar, they got increasingly more severe towards him as we grew older. He had been disciplined that there would be major consequences to failure, which stopped him from trying new things. Trying something new had the chance to result in dislike or failure, both of which had negative connotations for him. I was lucky to not have been harmed. Though I had a troubled mental state, I was still open to new things. I was more adventurous and willing to learn, I believed in its importance. Psychological studies have shown that children that were less harmed as a child are more likely to be extrovertive and passionate.
Today, my brother and I share some similarities, but we are completely different people. We share different hobbies, have different friends, and are involved in different activities. He is more involved with what he has always been good at and liked: computers, video games, and outdoor activities. He and I share common interests but our differences are very clear. I spoke to him about how our differences are from our childhood experiences and what we were surrounded with. It’s really interesting to consider how much someone’s childhood can affect who they are today. We went from having a relatively similar childhood to troubled adolescence to completely different adults.
