It Would Be Much Better If… Everyone Was Sincere.
How many times have we been hurt and afflicted by people’s words and thoughts ? And how many times did people’s frankness and straightforwardness led us to tears ?
All those times we wished that the people who wanted to hurt us didn’t say any of the words they really thought and meant. Maybe all those times, they broke our hearts only because they said something about us that we would have never wanted to hear. We would have liked to live in a fairytale, maybe pretending that problems and difficulties didn’t exist. But most of the times, real life is not a fairytale, and we have to face reality. For example, it can happen that the one we love doesn’t care about us any more. Therefore, when the people we love suddenly expose to us all their true feelings we have to face a whole range of problems we had never thought about before.
One day, out of the blue, your partner might come to you and say that they don’t love you any more. Now, this is the moment when the world all around you starts to crash, collide and collapse. Why don’t they love you anymore? What did it happen to make them to change their mind? You don’t know… You don’t have any clue… because you still love your partner in the same way you did the day before. Then, when you are home alone crying and wondering why they have decided to break up with you, you try to figure out if it was your fault, if you made any mistakes or if you said something wrong. Sometimes, you also come to wish that they hadn’t said any of those words and you would have preferred them to hide the truth from you. It is much easier not having to deal with such problems and issues: when you have to face the cruelty of reality and truth is much more complicated and harder than avoiding it.
On the other hand, there are some cases when your lover doesn’t love you anymore and doesn’t have the same feelings for you as before, so he/she starts cheating on you, without telling you that. You still carry on meeting them, thinking that nothing has changed between you. In reality, your partner is having another affair with someone else but you are so blinded by your love that you cannot imagine that this could happen to you. But, after a while, you start to realise that your lover isn’t the same anymore, they start acting differently and you start notice that something in your relationship is changed. Then, it doesn’t take long to you to discover that they have another affair and that they have cheated on you. When you discover that your partner has been having an affair, you feel they have made fun of you and your feelings. They have been using you as an object all this time
You start obsessing about the reason why your partner cheated on you. Why did they stop loving and caring about you? You ask yourself if it was your fault or if you said something wrong. But most of all, you start wondering why your partner didn’t tell you anything about his secret relationship and why he/she didn’t clarifyy at the beginning that he/she didn’t love you in the same way as before. The feeling that will cause the most pain to you will be the realisation that he hasn’t been true and sincere with you for a long time. Relationships are meant to be built on loyalty, sincerity and truthfulness. If one of these features is missing in a relationship, it is quite certain that it will end sooner or later.
In social and interpersonal relationships in general, people have to rely on their friend or partner honesty, otherwise the friendship could become more complicated. In effect, if someone should live with the suspect or the fear that their partner or friend is cheating, their life would be a nightmare. People can’t constantly ask themselves where their lover is or if he/she is with another guy instead of being at the office. Basically, always being too much worried about one’s own lover is not good for the general health of our body and soul. This is the reason why we must demand our lovers and friends to be honest and sincere. Yes, sometimes truth and reality are very hard to accept, but they are for sure much easier to bear, than being mocked by the dishonesty and the falsehood of the people, who we believed cared about us.
Anyway, whether our partner left us in a more “polite” or in an “impolite” way, after the break up we are in both cases destroyed and devastated by sorrow and sadness. The road to our full recovery may be long and winding, and we must be surrounded and supported by those who truly care about our happiness and joy. We must also start to dedicate more time to ourselves, doing the things we love and that help us feeling good and alive. We might also think of start doing something new in order to try to turn our life around a little bit. The key for the success of our rebirth is always to be positive and optimistic, to believe in one’s own qualities and thoughts, because it is essential always to be faithful and sincere with oneself.
In other words, sincerity is at the basis of everything and of every relationship, whether in the workplace or in a meaningful relationship. Some may think that telling a lie could be better sometimes because it could save a friendship or because the person involved could suffer less if he/she didn’t know anything about the truth. Yes… (I admit) sometimes, and in a very few cases, it is better to tell a lie than to say the truth, but it is sure that in the long term, the truth will be unveiled, and the person concerned will be destroyed by knowing that everybody kept the reality away from her.
Furthermore, being left by your partner isn’t the end of the world, so don’t take it too bad… And also don’t be afraid to tell the truth to your partner if you don’t love him/her anymore, but spit it out! Being sincere is cool.
With thanks to Jennifer A.
