It Would Be Much Better If We Listened To Our Mothers More
The advice mothers give their children often doesn’t reach them until they’ve flown the nest.
If I had listened to my mum more, especially when I was a hormonal teenager, my life would’ve been so much more straightforward. That’s because our mums know us better than we know ourselves, so I think it’s fair to say their advice is more than warranted, even if it is annoying. Also think about it, if we just listened to them then you’d hear one less of the ‘your mother knows best’ lecture that we all clearly love.
I’m not going to lie, it’s bloody annoying when someone gives you unsolicited advice because, how the earth do they know what you want or what you’re thinking? But trust me, your mum knows. I’m mainly writing this for all the teenagers, or even young adults, who are like I was, and argue with their mums because they don’t think she gets it, but I promise you she understands and in time you’ll appreciate her advice:
‘Your clothes, hairstyle and make-up are somewhat disastrous’
You know when you’re about 15 and you think that you know everything, but really you’re just a clueless mess that has devastating fashion sense?
Yeah unfortunately that was me.
Just imagine this: Uggs, with an extra layer of leg warmers, Hollister jeans with that odd rip on the thigh, layered multi-coloured vests with a long cardigan over the top, back-combed hair, a side fringe that covered half of the face, foundation that was 5 shades too dark and blusher that was 10 shades too light…
…and I was convinced that I looked fab.
My mum was never too fussed about my awful fashion sense, because she said I’d grow out of it, but she was seriously concerned about my hair and make-up. And to be honest, in hindsight, she had every right to be worried- it was tragic. She wasn’t concerned for the fact that I didn’t look nice, no. She was concerned because I looked like a homeless clown with a bird’s nest on top of my head.
If only I had just listened to her, then there wouldn’t be such embarrassing pictures in my mum’s photo album- and no I’m not going to show you! Thank goodness Instagram wasn’t a thing back then, otherwise those pictures would be on the internet to haunt me forever. So kids, listen carefully- don’t do what I did, and please listen to your mum when she tells you you look ridiculous, because she’s not lying.
‘I don’t like that friend’
This has to be one of the most frequent things my mum and I argued about when I was in school. I used to absolutely despise her advice on the topic, because who’s she to tell me who’s a good friend and who isn’t? Well, actually it turns out that mums have a great eye for spotting two-faced gremlins. My mum always knew who was a real friend and who wasn’t, even before I knew myself. But when I was younger I didn’t think that way, instead I thought her advice was extremely irritating because, it felt like she disliked some of my ‘mates’ for no apparent reason. And since she didn’t like them I was restricted to do certain things with them like have sleepovers and go parties together. As you can imagine this eventually put a strain on mine and those girls’ friendships because I couldn’t ‘bond’ which, according to them made me ‘uncool’. That’s when I should’ve seen their nasty streaks. But I didn’t, because I was a know-it-all teenager who instead found out that those girls weren’t my friends, the hard way.
But I’m so grateful that my mum didn’t let me get too involved with those girls, because their type of cool ‘bonding’ led to drugs, smoking, meeting older men and committing petty crimes, all whilst we were still in school.
So what seemed like unfair at the time, actually turned out to be a blessing in disguise, thanks to my mum.
‘Don’t fight with your siblings’
Ahh, siblings. An irreplaceable kind of love, but a very testing kind of love- those of you who have siblings know exactly what I’m talking about.
I have two siblings, a younger brother and sister, but the arguments were mainly with my sister. We would fight over the most petty things like clothes, make-up, shoes, showers, who gets to sit in the front seat of the car- the list just goes on. But the one consistent thing that each and every argument had in common was our mum telling us to ‘stop it, talk like sisters not enemies’. Well actually, when my sister acts like she’s the Queen of Thailand and treats me like a mere peasant, she is my enemy.
That girl sure knows how to make my blood boil.
Nevertheless, with maturity my sister and I have come to the understanding that no matter what we’re always going to be best friends, soul mates, and as we like to say, womb mates. If only we had listened to our mum sooner, all that lost time spent on pointless arguments could have been saved. And for those of you who have sisters, you know that sister fights aren’t just any kind of fight, they’re somewhat…dangerous- so I’m just glad I’m here to tell the tale.
‘Believe in yourself’
My mother’s advice wasn’t always about making me realise that my hair and make-up was tragic, or that my ‘friends’ were actually evil demons, or that my sister is actually not my enemy. No, my mum also gave me advice on understanding my full potential. I used to have very low self-esteem and no faith in my sporting or academic abilities. However, despite all my doubts I could always count on my mum to tell me that I was more than good enough and had no limits.
Bit soppy I know.
But despite all of my mothers love and support, I was still insecure and didn’t listen. Eventually, that self-doubt started to affect the way I lived my life. But thanks to my mum’s persistence, my self-confidence built up and I started to recognise my worth, my capabilities and my strong independent woman traits. So it doesn’t matter how ‘soppy’ or ‘uncool’ it seems, take your mama’s advice because there’s nothing else like it and you’ll regret it if you don’t.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not writing this because I’m ALWAYS going to listen to my mum, because we won’t agree on everything, but I’ve realised that my mum does know what’s best for me and it would be much better if I just listened to her. Because remember, our mothers won’t always be around but we’ll always need their advice.
