Things I wish I knew before cooking
Remember when grade school teachers used to say “there are no such things as a stupid question”? Well, let me tell you, yes, there are and you would be surprised how many one can ask when faced with simple tasks such as making some eggs. Growing up, I was not faced with many cooking challenges, to be honest I just didn’t truly learn, don’t get me wrong I won’t starve. However, prior to my arrival to university pretty much all I could do was to follow step by step instructions really really well. Tortellini was a specialty of mine, in around 5 minutes one can go from famished to filled with five simple steps. Boil water, open the package, throw the pasta in, wait for 3 around minutes, maybe while you wait for the following step you should wash your hands, set the table, learn to fly a kite. Who I’m I to judge what you do with your time? Now we have arrived at the final step, stay with me here because this is where it gets complicated, you must drain the water from the pot without burning yourself and yes, it sounds simple enough and yes, even with a burnt hand the tortellini still taste delicious and yes this has happened more times than I would like to admit. Cooking utensils were seen as strange, bizarre tools used by those who seemed to posses the knowledge on how to prepare meals without a high possibility of poisoning or burning oneself. Microwaves were seen as friends in my eyes and if I was feeling especially adventurous I could even use the oven to heat up some pan-fried chicken. As a child I guess I perceived cooking as a task or a duty. Nonetheless, as time has progressed I have realized cooking is actually quite enjoyable, washing dishes on the other hand should be considered a horrendous torture and should be added to the Geneva convention. Cooking is like building legos in a sense, you first have lots of individual items whom alone do not really amount to much but together can become spectacular. Creating something out of nothing is quite impressive and if it taste good on top, even better. The passion some chefs put into their work could be compared with art, plus fine cooking should always be accompanied by fine wine so all in all there is no downside. Except for dirty dishes, dirty dishes are the worst. Now at university, I’ve had to fend for myself, in the olden days, I would have had to grunt my wife goodbye and pray a mean looking dinosaur would not eat me. But remember, you do not have to outrun an eleven meter long lizard or a predatory bird the size of a small plane, you just have to outrun the slowest member of your group. Luckily, nowadays, the days of running away from vicious predators are long gone. After becoming deliveroo’s number one customer in Canterbury my girlfriend encouraged me to cook properly, this is how I ended up buying a George Foreman grill master. Unfortunately, even after my recent purchase I am still more chef Boyardee than chef Gordon Ramsey although with a bit of luck and a lot of patience any day now, Chef Otto Hall will arise. Overall, I could tell you my cooking has matured and grown just as I have during my four years in university but if I did I would be a liar and my pants would be on fire. So to answer the question, what I really wish I knew before cooking is if someone/anyone would clean the dishes for me. No, I’m joking I wish I knew more about cooking so I could treat myself and my current chef (my girlfriend), to beautifully prepared, fantastically tasting meals everyday. However, if there is one truth in this world is that no amount of michelin stars will taste as good as a home cooked meal will.
