Things I Wish I’d Known Before The End Of My Teens
Me vs My Boyfriend; the difference between an optimist and a cynic
Did you enjoy being a teenager?
Lewis: Yup.
Me: Absolutely not.
What were the hardest parts of being in your teens?
Lewis: Hardest parts of being in my teens — my teens weren’t actually that hard for me, personally. I think for a lot of people, it was sort of that strife to be independent. No longer being a kid and trying to play up to that, but still living with parents.
A lot of people have impressions of everything being like it is in Skins (2007–2013), when in reality it’s a lot more like Inbetweeners (2008–2012). Although this wasn’t necessarily a bad thing for me, I didn’t mind being an inbetweener. I was never unpopular though, that probably helped.
Me: Every part. From early puberty to the end of sixth form, I hated every minute of my teens, specifically because of my school. Once I got to uni it changed, I lost a lot of weight and somehow developed into a somewhat personable and social human being.
Do you have any regrets?
Lewis: I wouldn’t call them regrets necessarily, more like hindsight. No regrets at all really. But in hindsight, I should’ve taken advantage of the fact that you can get away with blue murder, basically. I was too concerned over getting my homework right, I wish I’d fucked about a bit more. There’s value to being a little shit.
Me: I don’t know if I could call them regrets, they’re more like things I wish hadn’t happened. Although I was a mouthy little shit, I see less value in it than my boyfriend seems to.
Is there anything you wish you did while you were a teenager?
Lewis: Learnt an instrument. I had this guitar, even took it to uni. I’d pick it up for 10 minutes, get frustrated and then put it down for another few weeks. I wish then that I’d dedicated the time to learning a talent like an instrument. I was never really pushed to do that, to pursue talent or anything. I dipped my toe in so many things, like sports, but I always quit, I never found one I applied myself to long term. Mum would take me to all these training sessions, but never really pushed me to dedicate myself.
Me: I wish I made less time for those who didn’t matter, and more time for myself. I wish I’d taken the time to ignore the opinions that meant nothing.
If you could go back, what would you change?
Lewis: The one thing I would’ve changed, leading off the last question, is find something I could be passionate about. Something I could’ve brought into my 20’s and beyond. I wonder whether it was me or my parents who were at fault, but either way I wish I’d motivated myself to improve at some of the things I took interest in. The crux of it is, I wish I’d relied on myself a little bit more, instead of complacently waiting for motivation to come from elsewhere.
Me: You’d have to pay me millions to go back, but if I did, I’d tell myself to stop caring what other people thought. I’d say have more fun and do the things you love and don’t let others ruin what makes you happy.
What advice would you give to those younger than you?
Lewis: Don’t rely or depend on others to succeed. Of course, take advice where it comes, but don’t expect others to push you or motivate you, do it yourself. During this important time in your life, motivate yourself to succeed, and go after the things you want.
Me: Teens, specifically girls, don’t get caught up in things that make you feel negative. Boys, online bullshit, the things you see in magazines or the mean people around you. Don’t pay attention to any of it. Just do you.
With thanks to Suzie Patterson