This is me.
Do you know what the worst thing to be asked by another person at university is? No, it’s not “Have you done the homework?” or “Can I borrow a tenner?”. The answer is simply: “Tell me about yourself!”
That open-ended question. Full of possibilities and wonder to express yourself! And yet you stand there for a few seconds, mouth ajar like a braindead goldfish while inside that little head of yours, your brain kicks into hyper gear as you relentlessly struggle to think of something interesting before then beginning to descend into a somewhat psychological reflective state…. Myself? Wait who am I? What do I do?
Of course, this is a slight exaggeration, yet many people do struggle with this question. But it’s difficulty is not because people cannot think of anything to say. For example, I had a rather nice pizza from the takeaway the other day. I enjoy pizza. There that’s something about me, great! But then you realise. No no, that’s bloody boring. I bet this person likes pizza too. I need something exciting and refreshing to really wow them!
No, the difficulty people find with this in social situations is finding something unique yet interesting to share, because everyone wants to appear as exceptional as humanly possible while not coming across like a total weirdo. In my three and a half years of navigating the perils and dangers that are university life, I have realised two things. One, and perhaps the most important thing to remember is that people won’t judge you for what you like or do unless they are a complete twat, in which case you are better off not getting to know them in the first place. But the fact is people worry so much about being judged, which leads into realisation two. The rise of the social clichés.
Over time these clichés have begun to surface when people are asked about themselves. By far the most common is the music cliché, where someone will say they love music, but avoid specifying what they really like. “I’m not really fussy, to be honest, I like a bit of everything”, they say. I say bullshit. It’s like watching a film with such obvious clichés that you know how it’s going to pan out, but unlike with a film, you can’t just turn over or leave. Doing that makes you fall into the worst cliché of all. Being a dickhead.
And yet despite these clichés, on the odd occasion, you might meet someone who is the Quentin Tarantino to your Saturday night out, defying all expectations right from the off when they are asked about themselves. They don’t need to bother with pointless clichés. They know what they like and aren’t afraid to show it.
And honestly, that is all it comes down to. Confidence. The confidence in liking what you like and not being afraid to share this with others in the fear that they may judge you for it. It may have been that way in secondary school sure, but university is a whole different ballpark. If you’re more open and honest about yourself, you’ll quickly find getting to know people and talking about yourself doesn’t have to be such a chore. Just please, next time you meet someone new, do yourself and that person a favour and skip the clichéd small talk and talk about what you really like. So go on, tell that person about how you have always loved post electronic acid funk house, or how you knit all your own clothes or that you play the gravikord (Yes it’s a real instrument. Google it). People are weird and wonderful. Don’t be afraid to share your weirdness. You might just be surprised.
