Wonder and Amazement! The Emperor’s New Clothes Bedazzles Our Entire City
Yesterday afternoon, our beloved Emperor finally took part in a long-awaited procession through the city where he was seen dressed in a newly designed silk gown of the finest sort.
The remarkable nature of His Imperial Highness’ newest garments has recently been the topic of much discussion and amazement. It was a mystery that was finally brought to light yesterday as the Emperor revealed his new dress to the general public.
According to a statement made by a spokesperson at the Imperial Court, the Emperor’s latest attire has been woven from a material so fine that it becomes invisible to anyone who is either unfit for his office or who is unusually stupid. The Emperor’s new clothes were received favourably by all at yesterday’s procession, which is proof that, truly, our empire is blessed with people of the highest calibre whose bright minds will undoubtedly shine like a beacon for the rest of the world.
Everyone who was present at the procession was much excited and awed by the sight of His Imperial Highness’ new gown. Women swooned and men sighed in admiration, while, from among the crowd, shouts of “Simply marvellous!” and “Such pattern! What colours!” could be heard. When asked, one of the Emperor’s closest advisors commented that the clothes had held him: “completely spellbound.”
Pictured above is a faithful depiction of the Emperor’s new dress, and we invite our gentle readers to join us in marvelling at the intricate pattern and beautiful colours. We would especially like to draw attention to the impressive length of the dazzling train and to the neatly stitched embroidering on the cusps of the delicate sleeves.
The design was done by two hitherto unknown weavers that have recently come into our city. Despite having little renown, their talent is clearly reflected in this exquisitely detailed work, and already now, many of the city’s nobles have allegedly been approaching the two weavers with requests for similar designs.
Finally, the Imperial Herald would like to distance itself from the rumour that a loud child was heard making remarks regarding the Emperor’s lack of attire during the procession. There is frankly no evidence that supports this story.
With thanks to Adele Irlam.
