A chapter about a chapter closed
This blog is a sequel from my previous story on closing chapters that I had written last week. It’s a sentiment that if you want change the direction of your life, you need to close some chapters in order to make room for bigger and better things to come.
My week has changed dramatically and continues to positively move in a direction that is both inspiring and uplifting, which could not have happened if I chose to keep reading a chapter that had no positive spin to it. I hope you enjoy what you are about to read and remember, anything is possible.
Closing the chapters that caused only destruction in my life surprisingly came with ease once I veered off the path that was leading to nowhere. Working out which ones to completely shut down to those I couldn’t wait to see flourish was exciting, refreshing and invigorating all at the same time. It felt like the top of my skull had flipped open, releasing a thousand words and leaving only positive and inspiring thoughts behind. I was finally able to listen to what was being so blatantly obvious and take note of all the signs that certain situations weren’t going to happen regardless of the effort and hope I had put in. So, I did myself a favour and closed that chapter. It didn’t deserve to be part of my life, not anymore. It had its chance.
So what happened you ask?
I was heading down a path of hope; hope that it was the one that I would eventually lead. Turned out that whether I took a left or a right, it would end up with a great big red stop sign…a dead end each and every time. Even when it looked as though there were only a few steps away to reaching, it would only end as false hope.
The past few months consisted of questions that just made things so much more confusing. If it were possible to measure, it would fill a whole football stadium and then some. Certain situations I thought that were going to make me happy were only making me more confused, I would ask all the right questions for clarification but ended up being more confused than ever. Metaphorically speaking it’s like moving one step forward, only to be two steps behind. I was turning into a bitter and angry woman, two traits that have no place in my personality, two feelings I don’t care to feel.
It wasn’t all heartache and sadness. Some great happy moments did follow me down this path, it just means that right at this minute, it’s time to leave that all behind. There are memories that will stay with me till the end of time, but for now, it’s time to place fate into my own hands and rise above it all, never to look back at that bitter angry person I had become but to take this experience as a lesson.
So as I’m standing in front of what is to be the last and final road block to this chapter, I am overcome with an overpowering force that is pushing me to turn around and walk back to where these hopes and dreams started, retracing every step with every single thought, reliving every feeling that had possessed my mind and body for so long. This was the only way that I could rid of these broken hopes once and for all.
I will choose no path, I am to take a different direction and leave an imprint of my own footsteps behind. Moving forward to where I know it will go, not to where I hope it would.