Reboot
Forget me, not
Carly left me a while ago. We dated for about three years, and I’m still here in our apartment. It’s quiet, too quiet. The silence is unsettling. To be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it. I can still hear her voice, her laugh, she haunts me. I’m at the point where I wonder if I’ll ever be able to move on. I’m lost. I’ve tried dating other girls, tried hanging out with friends, and even picked up a hobby. They’re all just distractions.
I’m not trying to avoid my thoughts or emotions. I’ve confronted them. I’ve been sitting with them for so long now. When does it go away? Whenever I think I’ve moved on, she comes back. I can’t get her out of my head.
I don’t recognize this version of myself. I’ve always thought that I was mentally and emotionally strong, but she broke me.
Am I even the same person?
In the past, I couldn’t comprehend how guys ended up so heartbroken. Be a man, move on, and find another one. Simple.
Now I understand what they were going through, it’s really not that simple. Especially, when you thought she was “the one.” I was naive, arrogant, and reckless. My ego needed to get checked, and here it was on a silver platter. I wasn’t hot shit, I was nobody, and now I’m all alone.
I wonder if she would be happy to see me like this? Drowning in my own misery without any hope of relief. I’m exhausted.
It feels like it’s too late. Somehow, I had internalized her deep within my subconscious. I am on the brink of insanity, screaming at her to get out of my head. It’s been years for God’s sake, just leave already. I don’t want to think about her anymore, I don’t want to be this person anymore, I just want to feel normal again without this undertone of torment and sorrow. I’m done.
You’d think with all the advancement in technology, there would be a cure for heartbreak. What good is this chip in my head if it can’t help with something as common as that?
They implant these in everyone now. Right when you’re born, install. It’s supposed to be for the future of mankind. Children read Milton and start Calculus as early as middle school, but there will always be idiots one way or another. Those chips don’t prevent you from drinking yourself into an early grave, that’s for sure.
Why do I miss her so much? My entire being craves her, her warmth, her touch, but it’s over. She’s gone. All that’s left are distant memories.
You know what? I deserved this, I needed to be humbled. I can admit that, but I just want to know. How much longer?
I slumped over to the couch and turned on the TV. I just wanted to forget, if only for a moment. The screen displayed an error. It showed columns of different colors and gave a steady ringing sound before turning into an ad.
A woman’s voice came through the speakers along with an animation of a man walking into a booth. It was nostalgic and reminded me of those old black and white cartoons.
She asked, “Are you always forgetting things? Do you have too much on your mind to keep track of? Well, make some room! Come on down to Splice and get your mind wiped! Evolve Today!”
This sounded too good to be true, I thought. It was almost like an answered prayer. I was a bit skeptical so I grabbed my laptop from the wood floor to do a bit of research.
The company bio said, “Splice Industries, the leader in neurological development and technology. We strive for the future and advancement in human evolution. Come join us today for our 45th anniversary.”
Sounds legitimate enough. Maybe, I should go down to their office and check out what they have to offer.
When I arrived I was awestruck by the size and beauty of the Splice Tower. It looked like a contemporary art sculpture and must’ve been at least fifty floors high. The building bent and curved and was completely surrounded by tinted glass with marbled white pillars. There was an ad playing in the window next to the entrance. It was the same one I saw back home.
“Come on down to Splice and get your mind wiped!”
I opened the door and walked in. On the other side of the entrance was a large circular room, with mirrored tiles, and a single white desk in the center. I felt overwhelmed by the vastness of the first floor. There was the scent of lemon lingering in the air. All I could hear was the echoes of my footsteps. Why was there so much empty space? When I approached, I was greeted by the receptionist. She had a black suit on, with oval-shaped glasses, and a blonde buzzed haircut.
“Good afternoon, Isaac. What brings you in today?” She asked.
My eyes flared, “How do you know my name?”
“Isn’t it obvious? Your microchip!” She tapped her head, “It is our product. Whenever someone walks through those doors, your data automates onto my computer screen.”
“That’s a bit — invasive,” I said.
“This is the world we live in,” she shrugged. “Might as well accept it. So, how can we help you today?”
I coughed and whispered, “I was hoping to wipe my mind.”
“We can certainly assist you with that.” She typed away at her keyboard and a projection of the menu appeared in front of me.
“Here are our options,” she said.
Reboot Menu:
Tier One: Delete an event, an experience, a few days
Tier Two: Erase months, years, entire relationships
Tier Three: Return to zero, complete reboot, start fresh with personality and knowledge intact
I had one arm crossed and rubbed my chin, “How do I know this will work?”
The receptionist stood with her head held high and said, “We at Splice Industries hold ourselves to the highest standard. We are the leading developers in neurological technology and can guarantee that our services are 100% accurate. We have gone through rigorous testing phases and are regulated by the Scientific Collective and Innovation (SCI). Before we begin, we are required to adhere to an agreement stating that we are responsible for any oversight or mishaps that might occur. Disclaimer: Responsibility is limited to ensuring each patient is functional and operational before leaving the premises. Any more questions?”
“Uh, okay? No, that sounds good enough I guess. I’ll go with Tier Two please.”
“Perfect! Now, what shall we wipe?” She smiled. “A bad summer, perhaps a friendship, or something traumatic?”
“Actually, I wanted to erase my last relationship.”
“Ah, well we’ve had plenty of those. Let’s take a look then, shall we?” She began clicking and scrolling at her desk, “Is it for… Carly?”
I stood there for a second, “Y — Yes.”
“Very well, would you please take a step back for me, Isaac?”
“Sure,” I took one step backward. “Like this?”
She gave me a thumbs up.
A loud whirring noise came from above. The ceiling had opened up and beyond that was nothing, just pitch-black. A glass cylinder came through the darkness and encapsulated me. I thought I was going to get sucked through, but the floor tile elevated me upwards instead. This was what I imagined being raptured would feel like. As I looked down at the receptionist, she waved goodbye. My hands were damp, and my throat grew tight. I couldn’t see a thing entering the tunnel. What was on the other side? It felt like I was passing through the tube for an eternity. Then, the platform came to an abrupt stop. I heard the glass rise up, but I was still in the dark. The lemon scent was gone, all that remained was my own echo. I reached my hands out trying to touch something, anything.
When I took a step forward, my foot began to levitate off the ground. I swung my arms back hoping to catch myself before hitting the floor, but my body was still, featherless. I was floating. It was a strange sensation, laying mid-air in an empty abyss. I felt relaxed and at peace for the first time in years. Is this what space is like?
A flash of light appeared. I found myself in a cube-shaped room immersed by television screens. They were everywhere, under, over, to my left, my right, and even on the floor. One by one, each of them turned on displaying something different. It all seemed vaguely familiar. I squinted and saw a couple kissing. Wait, is that me? The woman turned around, it was Carly. These were all of my memories, of us, together. I laid there stunned, there were so many things I had forgotten. All the times we cooked together, the road trips, date nights, everything. My eyes welled up with tears.
Somehow, the room began to rotate. Seeing our history laid bare in front of me was torture. Were they mocking me? I felt a sudden jolt run through my body, I jerked in pain. The hairs on my arms and legs stood straight up. The room gained speed until everything was mixed into a single blur. All I could make out was Carly’s face. Then, I heard something. The sound of thunderous static. Before I knew it, I was screaming in agony from the voltage coursing through my veins.
When I woke up, I was in a daze. Where was I? I wondered. I felt something on my face and gently touched it with my hand. A droplet of water sat on my finger. Where did this come from? Was I crying? I stood up and before I could brush myself off the floor opened up under me, and I fell through. I panicked, yelling and crying for help until I was dropped in front of a strange building.
I heard a voice say, “Evolve today.”
I looked up and read, “Splice Industries.”
What am I doing all the way over here? Oh well, all I know is, I’m in the city. Let’s hit up the boys and hit the club! I pulled out my phone and scrolled through my contacts.
“Isaac?” Someone called.
I turned around, and a stranger approached me.
“Hi?” I said.
She seemed like a cool person, genuine, and approachable.
“It is you,” she seemed relieved. “I was actually trying to get a hold of you. Can we talk?”
I couldn’t figure out where I knew her from, “I’m sorry, do I know you?”
“Isaac, it’s me.” She laughed.
I couldn't figure out who she was.
She paused before saying, “Carly.”
I pierced into her eyes, “I feel like I’ve met you before, but I don’t remember from where.”
She seemed surprised and just as confused as I was. She looked up at the Splice Tower and back at me. She gasped covering her mouth with her hand.
She leaned closer, “You don’t remember me?” She asked.
I scratched my head, “I can’t say that I do. I’m sorry.”
Droplets ran passed her cheeks, “How could you?”
I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t even know what I did.
I reached out to comfort her, “Are you okay?”
She slapped my hand and left, wiping away her tears.
That was weird. Hm, she seemed familiar somehow.
