Danger: Contains Pugs 🐶

The BYOB Week in Review: October 18, 2019

A lot to get to this week, but first: The Germans are racing pugs. [NYT]

That is all.

🍾 Photo Finish

A picture is supposed to say a thousand words, but there were two photos this week that could easily leave you speechless:

• The first is this typically goofy photo shoot of Kim Jong Un riding a gleaming white horse on a mountain somewhere north of the wall. [Vox]
• But before you say “wow, what a wacky country that must be” let me direct your attention to our second photo: Our supreme leader being supremely schooled by Nancy Pelosi. [Vox]

So, sure, the wagons of impeachment are circling and foreign powers from Ankara to Beijing have decided to pretend like America doesn’t exist (who can blame them?), but you better believe it was worth it for the lulz!*

*In case you don’t remember from a few weeks ago: Urban Dictionary is a cesspool of alt-right hate now!

🍸 Just Shiv Me

After long refusing to acknowledge its brilliance, I’m now one of those people who makes this song their ringtone and won’t stop telling people that Succession is one of the best shows on TV.

The show’s second season wrapped last weekend and even if you don’t watch I think you’ll agree that these links are so good you’d be more than willing to betray your [insert family member here].

• Dressing the Part: The New Yorker does what they do best and beautifully analyzes the epic yachtwear featured prominently on this season’s finale. [The New Yorker]
• Feeling Inspired? Preemptively spend your tax return on Shiv’s $1300 backless turtleneck dress (now only $600!). [Vulture]
• Feeling Confused? The rise of Succession, explained. [Vox, of course]
• Ugh, fine: Let’s just obsess about that amazing ending. [Vulture]

🍷 Updates

• From the Dept. of Saying the Quiet Part Out Loud: Acting Chief Staff Mick Mulvaney casually admitted to a White House quid pro quo with Ukraine yesterday because apparently nothing matters anymore. [The Hill]
• Sounds About Right: The Syrian ceasefire the U.S. brokered with Turkey (to stop the slaughter of the Kurds we abandoned) is already falling apart. [Vox]
• If You Brexit You Bought It: Boris Johnson has managed to strike a deal with the E.U. that may somehow be even worse than the dreaded “Irish Backstop” (TLDR: The deals lets Boris claim there’s no backstop while also creating a situation where Northern Ireland may essentially be abandoned by the rest of the U.K.). The whole mess comes to a head tomorrow (Saturday) when a special session of Parliament comes together for yet another vote. [NY Mag]
• Now You’ll Just Have to Smoke That Mango: Juul has vowed to discontinue fruity vapes. [The Verge]
• Our Neverending Transit Nightmare: Did NYC Subway and Bus Chief Andy Byford resign last week? We are delayed waiting for signals ahead. [Politico]

🍹 Mixed Links

• Forget-Me-Not: Last weekend I attended The New Yorker Festival’s “Are You Smarter Than a Fact Checker?” trivia competition and by far the easiest question was “name the cabinet-level department Rick Perry wanted to eliminate but couldn’t remember the name of.” Well I’m sad to say that Secretary Perry has officially resigned as Secretary of That Thing He Forgot (and it’s only partially because he’s implicated in the Ukraine scandal!). [Vox]
• In case you’re wondering: My team came in second place, which I think means we’re smarter than the New Yorker’s second-worst fact checker? Either way, our prize was this selfie with host Ronan Farrow. [Twitter]
• Speaking of Ronan: His new book is out this week and you can read about some of its most stunning revelations (think: stomach-churning Matt Lauer cover-up) at The Cut or listen to Farrow talk about it in one of the greatest interviews ever with his fiancé (!!!), Pod Save America’s Jon Lovett.
• Do Not Pass Go: The NYC City Council finally voted to close Rikers Island and replace it with a series of smaller, local jails (but if they followed my advice they’d trap prisoners somewhere they could never escape: The checkout line at Trader Joe’s). [NYT]

🍻 And finally this week…

From our friends at Little Old Lady Comedy

• Elsa Nierenberg: What I Imagine Timothée Chalamet Eats In A Day.
• Ellie Poole: Twelve Questions I Demand Be Asked At The Next Democratic Debate.
• Declan Cross: How To Tell If Your Boyfriend Has Been Possessed By The Demon Mephistopheles.