Book in review: Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box
by The Arbinger Institute
It was one of these moments when you read a book and it consumes youDon’t lose yourself in time you can not think of anything else you just one to get home faster to continue reading the book.
This book was recommended to me by one of the friends which opinion really matters to me as he does not say a lot but when he does, you listen. I have read a lot of self-perception books and probably more than is helpful to me. You can discover the most brilliant book in the world, but if you’re not in the right mindset at that time it will just fly by you. But this one was exactly what I needed in this moment of my life.
“Leadership and self-deception” book is one of these books that can change your life if you listen, it tells stories which you can relate in your life every single time. I think this phenomenon of trying to close ourselves from others and see yourself better than anyone else, blame others and justify your own actions is something I could relate myself so much. Simply seeing others as an object to you rather than people is just such a simple but powerful way to put it.
The lessons that you read about, the advice that this book gives in so precious and so important to everyone. One might not notice or realize that they went towards self-deception in their lives towards family members, towards coworkers.
It is definitely a book that turned my world upside down. I always knew I was struggling with these things in my life but had no idea how common it is and how to overcome it.
Powerful learning material, that I will definitely print it and keep it with me all the time.
Here is the essence of the learning material, but you will only fully understand it after reading this book.
Knowing the material:
- Self-betrayal leads to self-deception and “the box”
- When you’re in the box, you can’t focus on results
- Your influence and success will depend on being out of the box
- You get out of the box as you cease resisting other people
Living the material:
- Don’t try to be perfect. Do try to be better
- Don’t use the vocabulary -”the box and so on…” — with people who don’t already know it. Do use the principles in your own life.
- Don’t look for others’ boxes. Do look for your own.
- Don’t accuse others of being in the box. Do try to stay out of the box yourself.
- Don’t give up on yourself when you discover you’ve been in the box. Do keep trying.
- Don’t deny you’ve been in the box when you have been. Do apologize, then just keep marching forward, trying to be more helpful to others in the future.
- Don’t focus on what others are doing wrong. Do focus on what you can do right to help.
- Don’t worry whether others are helping you. Do worry whether you are helping others.