Notes From ‘Why We Eat Our Own’
‘Why We Eat Our Own’ by Michael Cheshire is a strange book. Written by a pastor who seems on the edge of burnout, he settles on a very real, hard truth. We’re mean:
Could we be wrong about how we approach redemption and grace? Why have I been taught so much about church discipline and correction and taught so little about grace, love, and restoration? Why does the Church eat its own? How can the world have better examples of restoring people than the Church?
How can the world have better examples of what it means to be a Christian? In Michael’s mind, that came come when we learn to love:
Imagine a church where we focused more on the people and less on their issues. What if we preached grace and repentance with a Christ-like mind and Christ-like love? Grace like that could change the world! And what the Church needs now are more men and women who have the courage to defend New Testament grace at all cost.
If we don’t know how to love, we don’t know how to be Christlike. In Michael’s experience, that’s true time and time again:
When it comes to showing grace, the Church is an epic failure.
When the hurt, tired, or disillusioned Christ-followers leave, they rarely bolt. Instead, they tend to fade out of view. They miss church here and there. Three or four weeks go by. They stop giving, serving, and eventually their absence goes unnoticed. I don’t even think that’s really the leadership’s fault, as much as the Christians in the church are not genuinely developing friendships within our congregations.
He also has little interest in hearing excuses from Christians about apathetic Christians. This new generation, he says, is loaded with passion and zeal that’s going wasted on the church:
Despite what you will hear from some religious leaders in today’s church culture, the average Christ- follower walking out the door is not weak, unwilling to be committed, or intrinsically selfish. The vast majority of these Christians are leaving for two main reasons: First, and foremost, they are tired of being treated harshly by other Christians. Second, they feel the church has lost relevance to its community and to what they are going through in their everyday lives.
Although our churches are missing the 20 and 30 year-old crowds, overall, volunteerism within that age group is actually climbing in this country. They are all about causes. They buy products that promote fair wages in obscure countries, and many of them live on less so they can help build wells in Africa. No, I’m sorry. They aren’t selfish. They just needed a better cause than raising money to recarpet the foyer.
All of these experiences has made Chesire’s experiences a unique one. He’s less interested in appealing to Christians, and more interested in reaching the world at whatever cost. This can be summed up in the words of a friend, who said to him:
“Michael, never let anything or anyone stop you from following Christ for yourself, even if it makes you look like, to some, a bad Christian.”
You see, the world finds Jesus even when the church won’t reveal him:
I was talking to a 28-year-old man who recently came to Christ who said something eye opening. He said that he will always consider Bono, lead singer from the band U2, his first pastor. The young man went on to tell me it was Bono’s call to prevent the spread and suffering of AIDS and the call to do more to help others around the world that pastored him. He heard Bono talk about how the Western world needed to get off their rears and do something. The famous shade-wearing rocker had challenged him. I couldn’t help but agree. I love Bono and his music, but it’s his heart that makes me continually give money to his causes. I like that he has a bold vision about forgiving debt in some third-world countries. Bono has played a vital role of caring for the world.
The book is well worth your time. Even if you disagree with the premise as a universal truth, there is no denying that people leave the faith due to bad experiences. Chesire concludes his book with this chilling indictment:
The body of Christ needs to wrap its mind around the fact that if the hemorrhaging of leaders away from the church doesn’t stop, things are going to get even worse. The Church will not get what it deserves. She won’t get what she wants or even what she pays for. She will not get what she loves. People. If we don’t start showing real love to the people serving in our churches then they will find a more loving place to go.
Words to remember.
