College Hit Me Like a Bus
The fact that I was a college student and that I was never going back to high school didn’t really hit me until the day before move-in. Like yeah, obviously I knew this was happening months prior and I spent countless dollars in preparation but it didn’t hit me until the very last night in my cozy bed. I wasn’t sad about the transition because I was beyond ready to move out, but I was more nostalgic over that chapter of my life being over. High school definitely was not the highlight of the past 4 years of my life but there are certain memories and events that occurred that will likely not happen again.
I am not one that is opposed to change but I do tend to be scared of change. I’m scared of starting college and falling behind, not making friends (or finding a truly close friend/friend group), and struggling to find my purpose career-wise.
I know I’m not the only freshman in college with these fears but when all of your best friends from home are just beginning their senior year of high school, it’s hard because they aren’t going through the same changes you are just yet and it can feel lonely. I’ve always had a really hard time putting myself out there and meeting new people but my friends helped me with that by pushing me and constantly supporting me when I needed it. Now I have to step out of my comfort zone and get out there myself.
I’ve only been a college student for just over a week now but one thing I have come to realize is that almost everyone has no idea what they’re doing. Almost everyone here is trying their best to keep up with classes, make new friends, and balance school, a social life, and much needed personal time in this transition — which makes me feel better.
Before you start your first year of college, everyone tells you that these will be the best years of your life and I’m looking forward to that becoming my truth even though it might take longer than I expected.
I’ve talked a lot about my fears and anxieties about being a freshman in college but if I change my mindset and focus more on what I’m hoping to accomplish, it takes some of the stress away. Although I am still nervous about finding new friends, I know the ones I do find will be some of the best and longest friendships I will experience. While not being sure about the career path I will take, I’m excited to expand my knowledge on subjects that I’m genuinely interested in and that will shape the rest of my life. And even though I’m worried about keeping up with assignments and grades, I know I have a strong, supportive community in the Thrive Program to help me and go through some similar struggles with as well. I believe in this first year of college I will discover things about myself and grow as a person and I’m hopeful that I will surround myself with people who do the same while we all experience this next chapter of our lives together.
