Rising Above Adversity
Being apart of the outcast group of black kids in a predominately white private school was hard. It was especial hard when I was the most overweight in that group and the class. From third to sixth grade, I was bullied by those who I thought were my friends, and by those who did not know me. Who knew that in the third grade I would meet people who were so cruel and would do anything to make my life a living hell. No matter what, there was never a day ,in the four years I had to deal with them, I had peace.
Going home crying and trying to tell my parents that I was fine and that they did not need to get involve, had became a habit of mine during those four years of torment. It was hard holding in everything I went through, but I did it so I would not have to explain what really went on in my life to others. The emotional pain had become so overwhelming when I was in my sixth grade year, I felt that if I had disappeared from the world, I would finally find peace and everyone would be happy. Who would think that a Christian girl with loving parents and a loving family would be suicidal. Well, my family was not with me during the eight hours I was in school.
Everyday after school, I would think about if I just ran away and never came back. I would think about how life would be so much easier if I just gave up and let my life go. This everyday thought was really a way for my to make my bullies happy. I thought that if I just ended my life, they would be happy. They would finally stop the pain if there was no one to endure it. I thought that if gave them want they wanted, both my life and their will be fine. It is sad to think that in the time of my bullying, was trying to find them a way to be happy instead for myself.
Even in the time that I was being bullied and emotionally abused, I would always think of how to please them so they could leave me alone. I would always think of others before I ever thought of myself. I feel as if that specific reason is why the bullying went on for so long. I never cared enough to put myself first, but also I was only in elementary school. After my first year in middle school, The bullying finally stopped. It was during this time that my maturity level grew and I learned how to stick up for myself and have self- confidence.
Once I had learned to love myself and care more for myself, the peace that I had been waiting for had finally come. The peace that I thought I would never experience had finally made its way into my life. I had finally found a way out of my pain without ending my life or staying in the predicament I was in. I had found my answer after four long years and that answer was self love. Self love was my way out of my adversity. After I found my answer, I found my true friends and till this day they are still here for me in my weakest moments, but I still realize that self love is what is needed more to get through any test or trial in life.
I look back at the time of my life and I see how much I have grown. Even now in the present day, there are times that I may get a little weak and lose some of my confidence, but I remind myself of what I went through and how I overcame it. I remind myself that nothing or no one can stop me from reaching my goals. I remind myself that, I rose above the pain. I want to be that person to tel my story and to help someone t there who may have gone through what I went through and show them that you can rise above adversity.
