Writing Analysis
The Tender Queerness of Mysaria and Rhaenyra
Fans were abuzz: it felt so unnecessary. House of the Dragon has incense, whorehouses, bloodied boars, rotten faces, and seppuku by dragonfire. So why draw the the line at two women kissing?
“It was so unnecessary,” “Ruined the episode,” and by far the most common complaint in one form or another, “It felt so forced.”
Of course some of the detractors are just trolls shrouding their dislike in “logic.” The classic “I’m not homophobic but…”
But others are genuinely confused. They might argue that regardless of whether the duo were of the same gender, the kiss didn’t “make sense.”
I admit, I didn’t see it coming either. My wife, on the other hand, had noticed the tension between them building since a couple episodes prior. But both of us agreed that the kiss “made sense.”
As similar debates rage about the “logic” or “sense” of creative decisions that look like “forced diversity,” it got me thinking what we mean by “logic” or “sense.” In a regency show where classical string ensembles play Pitbull and where characters are regularly race-swapped, why did so many fans decry Bridgerton’s decision to recast a male romantic interest as a woman (Michael to Michaela)?
It got me thinking about what we all actually mean when we say something “made sense,” and I suspect the problem is we’re not talking about logic. We’re talking about what I described in a previous article as the “ethos” of storytelling: credibility, that gut feeling that something’s “right.” As I describe in the article, it’s possible to have logos (logic) without ethos (the gut feeling of credibility). When you get the sense the writers are trying too hard to make things work, over-explaining, or concocting flimsy excuses to cover plot holes, you’ve encountered a situation where the writer failed to convey ethos even if they’ve technically constructed logos.
A fun example is when the main character of an action film survives or even comes back from the dead. There’s absolutely no way. And yet within the confines of the universe, there’s always some sort of convenient excuse that makes it possible for Tom Cruise or Vin Diesel to return for the next sequel. We know it doesn’t make any sense, even if the flimsy excuse is technically possible, but we’re okay with it because it appeals to our emotions, i.e. the writers rely on pathos.
There’s the rub: when we say a storytelling decision doesn’t “make sense,” often we’re not only talking about ethos but also about pathos. We’re pretty forgiving of completely un-credible events as long as the story appeals to our emotions.
It’s since come to light that the kiss wasn’t scripted. After discussing the scene, the actors and showrunner collectively agreed it would “make sense” for the two to kiss. According to the behind-the-scenes after the episode, the script only described “a breath” between the two women as they held each other in a moment of emotional intimacy — and that’s it.
For many queer women like my wife and me, that was enough.
The Queer Trope
What happened between Mysaria and Rhaenyra was a trope that is (and I say this with a lot of love) juvenile:
- Girl meets girl.
- girl makes herself vulnerable to Girl.
- Girl comforts girl.
- Girl, emotional epiphany, kisses girl.
The trauma-dumping-leads-to-kiss trope is used so often it’s corny. I hesitate to cite sources because I don’t want anyone to feel like they’ve been put on blast, but the trope is often used by amateur filmmakers or scribes of Wattpad and fanfiction. It’s also used by self-described auteurs and “literary” writers who are new to writing love stories between two women. That’s not to denigrate any of those artists: they’re still artists, and they’re using what works for their audiences. I know I certainly enjoy the trope.
All that to say, I was amused that the otherwise Shakespearean (even Old Testament-y) House of the Dragon used this trope.
Apart from the Queerness
Regardless of whether you’re familiar with the trauma-to-kiss trope of lesbian dramas and movies, there’s other reasons why the kiss “makes sense.” By Emma D’Arcy’s (Rhaenyra) own admission, though, “queer” is probably not a word that’s “in any way within Rhaenyra’s lexicon.” So what led her to kiss another woman?
By the time Rhaenyra finds herself alone in that room with Mysaria, Rhaenyra has been lambasted by everyone from Rhaenys to Jace for how she conducts herself as queen. Her closest allies are her strongest, and perhaps most hurtful, critics. She feels constrained by the very men who said they would support her. Daemon is a cool character, and he has his reasons, but he hasn’t been the support Rhaenyra needs: steadfast and reliable.
Rhaenyra has, to oversimplify, mommy issues. Maybe women issues more generally. Her mother died when she was young. She had no female role models and quickly lost her closest female peer, Alicent. At the time of the kiss, Rhaenyra had been rebuffed by a volatile Alicent several times and had recently lost her only female support, her aunt, Rhaenys Velaryon. And while they ended on good terms, Rhaenys was cold and sometimes even cruel until much later in Rhaenyra’s life.
Meanwhile, Rhaenyra is surrounded by men. Her entire fate has been dictated by men, from the father who named her his rightful heir to the men who men who would die to support or refute that claim. Her sons are questioned, humiliated, and even detested for looking like Harwin Strong as opposed to her husband, Laenor Velaryon. In an outburst of teenage angst, Jace blames her for his looks. Of course it takes two to tango; Rhaenyra, Harwin, and more widely the system that forced two kids to marry for power rather than love is to blame, but the point is that her sons are a visual reminder of her own alleged illegitimacy to ascend the throne.
Then, one of those sons is killed by her nephew and half-brother, Aemond Targaeryan. Her husband, Daemon, makes rash decisions that further threaten her claim to the throne. Though he claims these were mistakes, she can’t help but feel he’s using her to take the throne for himself. Even the Song of Ice and Fire Rhaenyra is striving to uphold was the vision of a man, Aegon the Conqueror.
Simply put, by the time Rhaenyra found herself alone in that room with Mysaria, she felt a) unsupported, b) pressured by men, and c) abandoned by women.
Mysaria is not only a woman, but, even rarer, someone who support her. Even rarer still is the reason why Mysaria supports her: not because she has the power of dragons behind her, or because she was appointed by King Viserys, but because she’s a good person. “Steadfast.” Wise enough to want peace, compassionate to her enemies.
In one monologue, Mysaria both invoked Rhaenyra’s protective side (by talking about her trauma) and conveyed that she saw her, really saw her, for who she was: a worthy person. A worthy ruler.
These are words she’s probably been longing to hear. Rhaenys intimated as much by showing her approval, but at least from what we’ve seen, she saved her explicit praise of Rhaenyra for her private conversations with her husband, Lord Corlys Velaryon. We know that she also held Alicent’s endorsement that she would “make a good queen” close to her heart, as evidenced by how bitter she was when she reminded Alicent of the comment.
This all leads back to the tender queerness of the kiss, because while “queer” might not exactly be the word the actresses themselves would’ve associated with the relationship between their characters, the trauma-dumping-leads-to-kiss trope is predicated exactly on this feeling: of being seen, truly, for who you are, without pretense or societal confusion. The girls in those stories are often not dealing with civil war or dragons, but they are still dealing with, for example, homophobia, or conservative parents, or religious restrictions that force them to step into a character. The girl who trauma dumps often feels like she finally gets to tell her story her own way, and she’s driven to kiss the other for accepting her as she is.
This is all very similar to what Emma D’Arcy says about Rhaenyra’s previous relationships, “there’s a lot of presentation, there’s a lot of bravado, often from both sides…Whereas with Mysaria, in this growing relationship — it’s remarkably honest.”
Perhaps all this is why, as Sonoya Mizuno (Mysaria) put it, the kiss “just felt right.”
Regardless of what you think about the kiss even after reading this article, I hope we can all agree that it was delightful to watch Rhaenyra hop on her dragon and ride off at the first sign of trouble right after making out with Mysaria. I know I laughed my head off. Is it any wonder Rhaenyra finally told her advisors and detractors to eff off with that unilateral, powerful move? That’s the emotional catharsis of kissing of girl who, you’re thrilled to find, likes you back.
