Losing Weight Without Triggering My Disordered Eating

A journey toward imperfection.

Photo by Jukan Tateisi on Unsplash

A couple of months ago, I wrote about how my doctor said my blood pressure was starting to get on the high side, and how he recommended losing about 20 pounds.

For the first couple of months, I tried to lose weight without weighing myself.

I ate better and walked more, thinking that would help. But I didn’t notice any changes.

Weighing myself, counting calories, and limiting food severely triggers my disordered eating. But I wasn’t making any progress. I felt trapped.

I also felt annoyed at the idea I wasn’t exercising, which my doctor wrongfully assumed. I can walk 10 miles in a day like it’s nothing. I always get in my 10K steps. And to hear something like, “Well, make sure you walk every day!” was kind of insulting. It definitely triggered something deep inside me.

I felt judged.

Regardless, the increase in walking did shit for me. My body was too used to walking long distances.

I was nervous, but I realized I had to change my approach.