The Great Padded Bra Debate:
To Push-up or Not to Push-up? That is the Question . . . Or Is It??
Are you someone who won’t leave the house unless you’re wearing a push-up bra? Or do you hate the idea of wearing a bra with any sort of padding in it? This can be a polarizing question for many women, especially with the rise of the body positivity movement in the last few years. However, even if you reject the feathers and lace “very sexy push-up” look, it doesn’t mean that you have to go completely au natural. The issue is not black and white. It shouldn’t be a question of “is padding good or bad?”, but of “do I feel good when I wear this?” Simply stated, it’s not a question of what you wear, but why you wear it.
How I See It
For me, it’s about preservation. Yes, preservation. As a small-breasted woman, my breasts are dainty, and shirts can sometimes flatten or camouflage my natural shape. So when I’m selecting a bra, my main criteria is that the bra should preserve my shape underneath my clothing.
It’s not about trying to be something that I am not. It’s not about covering, camouflaging, or fixing what I have. If this was my motive, I would wear an extreme push up bra that promised a 2x cup increase, or I would opt for plastic surgery. For me, it’s simply about preserving the integrity of what I have, and creating a shape that I like and that works well with my clothes. For that reason, I choose to wear slightly lined bras with natural-looking padding.
You have that favorite pair of jeans that accentuates your butt and makes it look extra perky, right? Well how is the type of bra you wear any different? In my view, it’s not.
The Extremist View
In general, I have trouble with extreme stances. Yoyo diets, work hard/play hard mentalities — it’s all very hard to sustain and justify. In the case of body image, if you subscribe to the point of view that in order to be fully authentic and self-accepting you shouldn’t enhance anything about your body, that technically rules out all forms of makeup, hair dye, tattoos, tanning, etc. As you can see, this is not what most of us want or intend.
Enhancement is a tricky word because its connotation changes depending on the circumstances. In the makeup world, “enhance” simply refers to accentuating your features. But in the realm of plastic surgery, “enhance” means surgical alteration. For this reason, the term “enhancing your bust” can get a bad rep from body love enthusiasts, and I believe this negative view trickles down to the push-up bra.
I prefer the phrase “accentuating your natural figure” — it sounds less extreme. I don’t want my figure to disappear under clothes, so I choose to wear a bra with natural looking push-up or padding that accentuates my natural shape in outfits. Just like those of you who use a belt to accentuate a cinched in waist and hourglass proportion, I use bras with slight padding to accentuate my shape and help my shirts lay better. That’s all. In fact, this is why I change up my bra depending on which shirt I’m wearing. It comes down to functionality and figure-flattering forms, not superficiality.
We should have fun playing with our appearance, as long as we’re doing it for the right reasons. It’s an “I choose” versus an “I should” question. “I choose to do this because I respect my body” versus “I should or have to do this because I am ashamed of my body.” This can be tricky to navigate, so here are some things to consider to help you determine if you’re approaching it with the right lens.
Self Assessment & Reflection
- Pretend that you went on a trip and forgot to bring your padded bra, how would you feel? If the answer is panicked, then that might be a sign that you’re unhealthily attached to the sense of security your bra gives you.
- How do you feel when you take off your push-up bra or wear a swimsuit with less shaping? Do you feel embarrassed? Do you worry that your “exposed” breasts look drastically different than your covered breasts? If your answer is yes, it could mean that your push-up bra is the band-aid approach you’re taking to feel better about your underlying shame and insecurity. It may make you feel better temporarily, but it’s not addressing the underlying problem — your shame. I only mention this because I’ve been in your shoes. Shame can be a tough problem to tackle, but awareness of shame is the first step to overcoming it. With courage and knowledge you can move beyond it. Take a look at my story.
- Who are you wearing your padded bra for? Do you choose to wear it because you prefer the look, or do you feel that you have to wear it in order to feel good about yourself with men or around other women? If you consider others’ opinions before you put on your bra, it’s a sign that you could be unhealthily comparing yourself to others.
Conclusion
Hopefully thinking through these questions helps shed light on your approach to body image. It can be tough to reconcile a desire for authenticity and acceptance with a desire to look your best, but you will always be on the right track if you go back to the why. Are you doing this because you want to, or because you feel that you have to? Are your motives rooted in self love or in shame? When you love and accept your body, you should feel empowered to play with it, adorn it with beautiful things, and accentuate its loveliness. You shouldn’t feel guilty or superficial for doing this. However, if you don’t cultivate that self love first, no amount of exterior alteration is going to help you feel fully confident or empowered. It has to start within you.
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