Why I Might Have Passed on Your Novel
When the action in a story doesn’t have a why
Recently, I opened a submission, and although the writing was lovely and the characters more distinguished than most, I finally decided to pass on the manuscript. Why? Because the actions — the complications, dilemmas, and decisions and indecision — over the course of the first fifteen pages didn’t create enough interest or tension to make me ask for more.
Those first fifteen pages were missing an inciting incident, and because there wasn’t an inciting incident, there wasn’t a reason to act. It felt as if the writer had put people on stage and had them doing things — having conversations, writing in a journal, teasing one another, giving life advice — for no reason other than they had nothing else to do. Without an inciting incident, the actions had nothing to anchor them. No reason for happening. And without an inciting incident, the characters did not face any of the complications, dilemmas, or decisions that create tension and move a novel forward. So, I passed.
No matter how interesting a character might be, we don’t read books with people walking around and saying things to one another for no reason. There has to be a point to the story, a driving factor, something that compels a character to act in a particular way.
Honestly, if we want to watch people go through their day without having anything at stake, we can go to work or dinner at mom’s house. We don’t need to pick up a book to understand tedium or everydayness. We pick up a book to be challenged by an idea, a dilemma, a fear, or a struggle. We pick up a book because we have a curiosity about how the characters in a story will overcome adversity, evil, loss, abandonment, heartbreak, or any of the myriad of other themes writers take on. We are curious because we all wonder what we would do if faced with a similar situation. And we want to learn something about a situation we have never experienced or would never put ourselves in.
Give readers a lackluster first fifteen pages missing a compelling inciting incident, a compounding complication, intriguing characters involved in things that relate directly to the inciting incident or the ultimate resolution, on any of these, and they will close the book or turn off their Kindle before they get to page 20. Give readers a reason strong why, a reason to read, and they will follow your story from page to page until they reach “The End.”
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Sandra O’Donnell is the author of Your First Fifteen Pages. She’s read hundreds of queries and has a passion for helping writers create stories that connect with agents, publishers, and readers.
