Abuse is abuse!
Whether it be perpetrated by a man or a woman.
The feminism movement is responsible for raising awareness on domestic violence that has become a major cause of women being beaten that is more likely to happen inside their homes than outside. According to bell hooks,
“As the (feminism) movement progressed evidence showed that there was also domestic violence present in same-sex relations, that women in relationships with women were and are oftentimes the victims of abuse, that children were also victims of adult patriarchal violence enacted by women and men”
She uses the term patriarchal violence to replace domestic violence to highlight a more acceptable form of coercive forces, as long as it is acted upon by someone who is seen as a more powerful person in order to take control. Since domestic violence had been desensitized due to lack of serious efforts of its complete abolition, because it is taken so lightly and less threatening as it sounds like a problem to be solved by people in their private homes — patriarchal violence becomes a more powerful term to substitute because it reminds us of violence that happens because of sexist thoughts, in which male domination is acceptable that excuses forms of violence driven by taking control over others. In order to end violence towards women, however, all forms of patriarchal violence must also be terminated — even those that are perpetrated by women.
Feminism had been successful in letting people become aware of the violence women face in our male dominated society, however, some feminists focus on violence towards women and forget to include the fact that men face the same problem, too. As bell hooks, a feminist herself, states
“Had all feminist thinkers expressed outrage at patriarchal violence perpetrated by women, placing it on equal footing with male violence against women, it would have been and will be harder for the public to dismiss attention given patriarchal violence by seeing it as an anti-male agenda.”
In this social experiment on what is demonstrated to be a patriarchal violence happening in public, people react differently when a man is the perpetrator of violence vs. when it is a woman. Everyone stopped the man within the first 10 seconds of the man abusing her, fighting for the woman who could not fight back. When the man, however, was beaten up by the woman and even slammed against the wall or store windows, this man taking punches, slaps and pushed in the ground, people were entertained and majority of them were even laughing at him. Why? Because he is a man and he should “man up” and take it all from a woman. This is what our male dominated society teaches us. Men cannot hit a woman. When a woman beats a man, he should be able to take it like a man. This is an example of what patriarchal violence is as defined by hooks— a woman being able to hit a man which is accepted due to the sexist thinking that a man must be strong and should not even be feeling pain, but when a woman is the one taking in the punches people are running to help because she is seen as inferior and cannot fight back and is expected to be weak. According to this video, the Department of Justice claims that a man is the victim of physical abuse every 37 seconds, but they are embarrassed to admit that they are beaten by their women partners. This form of violence is the same kind of violence women and children face in our male dominated society. In order to help the 1.3 million women each year from experiencing violence, we must end all forms of patriarchal violence all together, whether it is perpetrated by a man or a woman.
