ABUSE IS NOT THE ANSWER
When people talk about domestic violence, or abuse within a couple, people conclude that it always leads to the female being the victim and the male being the abuser. According to these statistics, that is usually what ends up happening. But does that mean it never happens the other way around? Has a man ever been victimized to domestic abuse?
Hearing stories about men being victims of domestic abuse usually aren’t, if not ever, brought up in any discussions. Just because no one talks about them, doesn’t mean that it never happens. I myself never thought that this type of violence ever happens until my cousin told me himself last year that he has been severely beaten by his ex-girlfriend countless times over things that doesn’t end up her way. My cousin told me that this type of abuse had happened shortly after she founded out that he had cheated on her once when he was in Las Vegas. I was highly upset at the fact that he had been beaten multiple times due to a mistake that he had made. If anyone were to see my cousin and his ex-girlfriend, and knew about this type of abuse happening, they would also be upset because my cousin is 5'5, skinny, and she was 5'10, thick built. Not that physicality mattered, but it also showed the disadvantage my cousin had when he was defending himself when being hit a couple times. In the end, I know that my cousin had done a bad mistake, but it did not have to lead to this type of future for the both of them. Instead of moving on and learning from their mistakes quickly, they decided to prolong their relationship a couple more months before officially ending it.
A social activist named Bell Hooks, takes a look at all types of abuse within her work, Feminism is for Everybody. In her work she claims that we always group males with violence because of our sexist mindset, and that men are always aggressive. No one typically thinks of men being victims because of the society views towards men being too macho to be in any type of situation where they were a victim of any domestic abuse. This made me think even more about the male victims of domestic abuse within the country, because if my cousin can go through it, then anyone else can undergo such tragedy anywhere in this world.
Hooks tries to apply the fact that one gender shouldn’t be held responsible for violence itself, as it may be started by anyone. In her work, she implicates the theory of feminism to not only be felt by women, but by men also. She believes that all should endure equality, justice and mutual respect within each other.
She had analyzed many challenging issues that feminist go through this day in age that deals with race, work, class, violence and sexual rights. Hook’s goals are to implement an optimistic idea that tries to alternate society’s racist, homophobic, and patriarchal culture for a better future ahead of us.
