Double Consciousness in Homosexuality People.
“It is a peculiar sensation, this double-consciousness, this sense of always looking at one’s self through the eyes of others, of measuring one’s soul by the tape of a world that looks on in amused contempt and pity. “ -W.E.B. Du Bois
In my philosophy class, I read The Souls of Black Folk by W.E.B. DuBois and one of the themes we discussed was “double consciousness.” What does “double consciousness” mean? Dubois stated it is a sense of always looking at one-self through another person’s perception. For instance, Dubois was an African-American where he believed Africa was his homeland, however, he saw America as a land where he was taken against his will to be a slave. He did not want to integrate African culture, but rather, allow a man to be part American and part African. If this were to happen, it is quite possible that the mixed individual would not be criticized. With this in mind, this excerpt from the book relates to me because of my sexual identity.
We live in a society where a male and a female are meant for one another. When two of the same gender is seen together as a couple, negativity is the only thing they will receive. As for me, everyone around me was surprised that I was a lesbian. I knew my friend’s opinions of me changed as most of them drifted apart from me. Even until this day, I feel very oppressed in many ways. What I meant by that is I feel limited in my words and actions, even in the way I dressed. I remembered during a wedding, all the females were expected to wear dresses and the males were supposed to wear suits. I personally did not like to wear dresses but I chose to wear one because I did not want people to see me differently. I also did not want my family to feel insulted if I were to wear a suit. However, being in that dress made me feel uncomfortable and ashamed. I felt I was not myself but an object. After that experience, I never wanted to go to another wedding ever again. However, I decided to attend one of my closest friends’ wedding. Only this time, I was allowed to wear a suit. Even though I was filled with excitement, those around me were still judging me. Thus, I felt abnormal and I needed to possess two different identities. Within my group of close friends, I can act, dress, and be myself. On the other hand, with my family, classmates and coworkers I have to act a certain way around them. In my hometown of Vietnam, being gay was not widely accepted. I thought that the U.S would be different because it was well known as a country of freedom. Even though same-sex marriage bill has just passed few months ago, people always had a problem with gay people and it is going take a while to change a perspective that has existed over many generations.
This is similar to the issue that Dubois presented about double-consciousness in a sense that I struggled with the societal concept of homosexuality like how Dubois realized that being black was a “problem” in American society. Under society’s view, I am considered as “abnormal” person. Just like how Dubois felt that being black was a “problem”, I felt like being a lesbian in our society today is problematic. I could not truly express myself. I had to change my behavior, acting, and appearances according to certain people’s aspect. Although Dubois had brought up the concept of “double consciousness” over a century ago, this concept still exists today, not only to African-Americans but to homosexual people too.
