“Perhaps the greatest (and smallest) mistake humanity has made is to give our babies opposite gender names — such an innocent but terrible mistake..”(L. S. Vigotsky).

We label a child from birth. We differentiate them based on their gender. We have expectations that they will play that gender role in society. And if they don’t, we judge them.

“We have incarnated the word, the process of naming itself, and the word we have incarnated is ‘male.’ It was only a word, but we have let it dominate our psychology and our social structures. We have used it to alienate half of humanity from the gift giving norm” (L. S. Vigotsky).

“I love my child. I have taken care of them since birth. I have grocery shopped for baby food. I have bathed them. And I have quit my job to be a stay at home father.”

Society declares that this is a mother’s role, the nurturing gift-giving female. Mothers must be the ones to care, to cook, to love, to feel, and to cry. What if you saw a man do this? We’d label them as weak, emotional, and feminine.

Who has the power to reinforce these role rules? Society does. We, as humans, want to be accepted by society. We, as women, must dress like one and act like one, despite the painful heels we must wear, the uncomfortable long hair we must maintain, and the inability to burp and fart in front of others, all so that we can fit in. We, as men, must grow facial hair, be tough both physically and emotionally, and be the one to financially provide. We have given roles to both genders and, in Vigotsky’s perspective, we have given the males a negative role in society. Half of the world’s population lack in giving because of the way society perceives men.

However, in today’s world, at least in the United States, we have become more comfortable and accepting of switching gender roles. Men will not be discriminated for knowing how to cook, having long hair, taking yoga classes or being a stay at home father. Women will not be discriminated for being a professional athlete, wearing sweatpants, having a pixie haircut, and being able to financially provide for themselves and their family.

After generations of labeling the roles between men and women, we are finally parting from the idea of what makes us different.

“We need a new word-gift for all of those small creatures who are our greatest gifts to each other, to the future and to themselves.”

Vigotsky believes that in order to completely get rid of these gender norms, we must identify men and woman as one-word.

However, I don’t believe that Vigotsky’s answer is the solution. I don’t believe that a single word could change how we perceive women and men because society has already improved so much in the way that women can play sports and men can cook while we still have the terms “male” and “female” in our vocabulary. I believe that it is possible to regain the gift-giving norm in the “males” as we are slowly realizing that we are just people that are similar in many ways.