sometimes you just learn to…
I’ve been on an an intimate journey. An intimate journey of self-discovery, self-love, self-acceptance, self-empowerment, and self-priority. Throughout the years, I’ve mostly focused on others… their needs, their wants, their issues… I’ve also focused on being a support system for them by providing solutions to their questions even with something as simple as answers that can be “googled” or “yelped.” I never realized how much of my availability really took time away from my self reflection.
Growing up, I’ve learned to put my needs before others. I was raised by parents who often sacrifice their own for the needs of others. How my dad would literally use is finances to bring joy to others instead of buying his medicine. My mom would never confront someone who hurt her feelings because she thought that it may cause pain to her offender (by the way, if you know my mom, you’d agree that she is the most loving, selfless, giving, warm, and faithful woman). I was so filled with these “life lessons” that it blinded me so much and instead, it felt like I was carrying the world’s issues on my shoulders.To make things more difficult, I’m in the service profession… so I’m constantly putting the needs of others every day. Every hour. Every minute. I often come home feeling drained after a full day’s work.
This past week, I’ve been meditating every day, connecting with Spirit… with my Higher Self. The message of “Let It Go” (no, not Disney’s Frozen) has been ringing in my ears along with Faith, Trust, Patience and Believe. All week, I’ve been thinking about what I could possibly “let go” and decrease the amount of unnecessary distractions I have in my life. Netflix? (Yes, totally binged-watched Season 1 of Gilmore Girls), Twitter? My obsessive love for my dog, Fred? My interest for sports? What about my constant need to grab my phone and log in to Facebook and check out what my friends and family are doing? I realized how much effort goes into grabbing my phone, looking through the News/Update Feed, responding to something (both positive and negative) that caught my attention… I started feel so opinionated in everyone’s business. Yes, even me “liking” someone’s post felt like it warranted my opinion which in reality, it didn’t.
I have to say, after minimizing my Facebook usage and check-ins, I felt a huge load off my shoulders. That all the negativity going around (most especially because of the upcoming election), even the need to like or love or laugh, or be sad at someone’s post just seemed unnecessary. I just had to break the cycle… for me and for other people.
I’m curious to see what replaces this decision… Lesson learned: Letting go can be empowering.